ďI know whatís been on your mind. Your afraid its all been wasted time!Ē Eagles
Purpose of this? Because some have asked, and some need to think.
You have the feeling that time is slipping past you and you donít know where it has gone. Does it seem on Sunday morning that it was just Wednesday? Do you wonder if you will ever get everything done that you have set out to do, today, tomorrow, next year? Time flyís when your having fun, or so they say but it seems to fly when you arenít having fun too! When all you do is work and try to shove some form of entertainment in between the headaches, the problems, the all consuming need to scream at someone, something, anything in order to take a 20 minute nap!
What have you accomplished so far this year? Have you fulfilled that new years resolution? Have you written that book? Is that art project you swore youíd finish before the end of January done? Maybe you felt the need to stop smoking, eat healthier, exercise, get out and meet new people, enjoy new experiences. Have you fulfilled that promise you made to your companion, your wife, husband, lover? How close are you to doing all of those things you vowed you would do in your lifetime? Do you even care anymore? Does it matter to anyone if you never do any of those things you said you would do?
Questions that I have been asked all to recently and perhaps need to answer for some who donít seem to know the answers. But if I am going to answer, how about you, care to answer these questions?
Yes, the book is finished, one of three currently in progress. The 36th book written by my hand, and the first that will be published under my real name. To those who know me, you know that this is something I dread worse then death.
The art project. NO! I am not an artist and the only things I can draw are eyes. Yes, I said eyes. Any type, shape or color, you name them I can draw them but I cannot draw a single other object. So, I will stick to air brushing ceramic dragons which is something I am good at!
I stopped smoking a long time ago. I eat about as healthy as you can get without despising food completely. I exercise whenever I am not working. Fulfilling that promise to my companion on the other hand, is a different story, isnít it? No, I have not nor am I likely to do so in the near future.
How close am I to fulfilling all of the goals I set for myself in my lifetime? Long ago I decided that there was nothing in this world I did not want to experience at least once in my lifetime. Many of these things I have done, not all were enjoyed but many were lessons well learned. I have traveled the world over, I have tasted almost all types of food. I have seen the wonders of the world. I have loved and hated many people, places and things. I have spent time with some of the most intelligent, talented people in the world. I have done many things most people only dream of doing. Some of these experiences were dangerous and painful, some were happy and pleasurable, others were frightening and grief riddled, and still more were, I hate to admit it, just plain stupid. But I do not regret a single moment or experience. No, I have not done all of the things I wish to do, and I plan on doing many more. I hope I will never fulfill this goal.
Do I even care anymore? Yes, I do care. I love life and living, even when there seems no purpose in much of what goes on in my daily life. I care about what I want, what the people I care about want and those I wish to make happy want.
Does it matter to anyone? No, I donít think it does. ButÖ it matters to me and in the end that is all that really matters.
So, stop asking me the same old tired questions. Ask me something new, something original, something you really deep down want to know. I have no more time to waste on what has already been answered, and neither do you!