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#154754 - 04/04/06 02:37 PM Toilet Seat Meditation
x9x Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 12/10/04
Posts: 958
Loc: Flanders - Europe
Dr Lavey was totally right in his Devils notebook about the toilet part, in fact i just read it again and started smiling..
If you have a good lock on the door and a comfortable seat, there's almost no better place to read a good book or even make some business decisions+ like i do personally.
Absorbing input while releasing outflow.
Those two pages are funny as hell for sure.
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#154755 - 04/04/06 02:43 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: x9x]
Hydra_M_Star Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 03/29/06
Posts: 416
Loc: Charlotte, NC
It is also one of the few places I know I won't be bothered. But I think my husband is starting to catch on to me and the other day knocked on the door to ask me if I was using the toilet or just reading.
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Hail Satan!
Hydra M. Star

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#154756 - 04/04/06 05:17 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: x9x]
RandomStranger Offline
CoS Warlock

Registered: 03/09/05
Posts: 2770
Loc: Here.
My toilet has a special preasure switch on it.

Everytime the switch is activated, a light goes on somewhere that prompts someone to call my phone.

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#154757 - 04/04/06 05:30 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: x9x]
Danny Mc. Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 11/05/04
Posts: 2143
Loc: Taxationland
I always seem to have the dreaded phone call or door bell, just seems to disrupt the natural process! In Somalia we had outhouses and the mortars were awful! Needless to say, I got it down to a quick swish and flick! H.S.!
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"To be born into this world a sentient, self-conscious and reasoning being, surrounded by inexhaustible glories in Nature, which we may comprehend, possess,enjoy; to be able to rise on the wings of a lofty imagination; to be able to get glimpses of the ideally perfect; to apprehend the Divine; it is to the development and enjoyment of these high powers that the young man is invited. How dare he refuse to qualify himself by the most perfect training of all his powers." Lyman J. Gage 1910


"Follow Me!", John M. (Delta).

"I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think." Something Magistra Isabel posted. laugh

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#154758 - 04/04/06 06:04 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: RandomStranger]
Mile_Highlander Offline


Registered: 03/16/06
Posts: 224
I had a girlfriend that used to bust in on me. Damn annoying.... Possibly too much information!

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#154759 - 04/04/06 07:21 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: Hydra_M_Star]
TrojZyr Offline
CoS Witch

Registered: 07/25/01
Posts: 12990
Loc: The Solid State
Precisely.

The bathroom is one place where you can usually be sure no one will bother you, stare at you, or prod at you. It's a great place to sit and read, or just sit and meditate.
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"The strong rule the weak, and the cunning rule over all." HS!

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#154760 - 04/04/06 09:07 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: x9x]
toad Offline

CoS Member

Registered: 11/12/03
Posts: 1182
Loc: texas
I call mine my "office", and I do most of my reading in there. I've been thinking of building a bookshelf for in front of the crapper.
Also, I take the cordless in with me if nobody else is home. I don't usually answer the phone, but I might think of something and want to make a call.
What gets me is how many people get upset over the thought of eating in the bathroom. If I just made myself a tasty sandwich, and am about halfway through it when the mood hits me, I'm taking the sandwich with me.
All I need now is a laptop so that I can surf the web while in there.
Toad
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Hail Shadow

I have the power to channel my imagination into ever-soaring levels of suspicion and paranoia.

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#154761 - 04/04/06 10:57 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: x9x]
uncleherpe Offline


Registered: 03/22/05
Posts: 499
Quote:

Dr Lavey was totally right in his Devils notebook about the toilet part, in fact i just read it again and started smiling..
If you have a good lock on the door and a comfortable seat, there's almost no better place to read a good book or even make some business decisions+ like i do personally.
Absorbing input while releasing outflow.
Those two pages are funny as hell for sure.





i read shampoo bottles when im on the john. or whatever else is around that has labels on it.
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One stupid post too many.

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#154762 - 04/04/06 11:04 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: uncleherpe]
Vincent Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 10/07/02
Posts: 319
Loc: B.C.
The best reason to have some good books lying around in there!

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#154763 - 04/04/06 11:25 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: RandomStranger]
Discipline Offline
CoS Warlock

Registered: 08/25/03
Posts: 6796
Loc: Forever West
You just keep getting funner and funner.

I am really starting to enjoy your posts.
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"I've learned . . . that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes." ~Andy Rooney

"At last I shall have time to devote myself seriously and freely to the destruction of all my former opinions." ~Descartes

“The first principle is that you must not fool yourself—and you are the easiest person to fool.” ~Richard Feynman

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#154764 - 04/04/06 11:58 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: Vincent]
uncleherpe Offline


Registered: 03/22/05
Posts: 499
Quote:

The best reason to have some good books lying around in there!





well its nice to know what to do if I accidently swallowed something...
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One stupid post too many.

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#154765 - 04/05/06 12:30 AM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: uncleherpe]
Vincent Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 10/07/02
Posts: 319
Loc: B.C.
But shampoo is only half your problem!

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#154766 - 04/05/06 01:02 AM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: x9x]
Bill_M Offline
CoS Reverend

Registered: 07/28/01
Posts: 11554
Loc: New England, USA
I honestly suspect men on the whole have more of that meditation-like attachment to taking a #2. It's the only time we sit down to do the job. You can take a #1 with no barrier separating you and the guy at the urinal next to you, but a #2 seems to demand a long time relaxing in a private environment. The public men's rooms never get couches or social chatter anyway.

"For Eigerman bright ideas and excretion were inextricably linked; he did all his best thinking with his trousers around his ankles. More than once, in his cups, he'd explained to any who'd listen that world peace and a cure for cancer could be achieved overnight if the wise and the good would just sit down and take a crap together." - Clive Barker, Cabal
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#154767 - 04/05/06 02:01 AM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: Discipline]
RandomStranger Offline
CoS Warlock

Registered: 03/09/05
Posts: 2770
Loc: Here.
Thank you, sir!
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#154768 - 04/05/06 02:23 AM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: x9x]
False_Messiah78 Offline
Banned

Registered: 12/27/04
Posts: 1449
Loc: New York State
As I have posted on this before, all my best reading has been done while sitting on the throne.

In fact, the entirety of The Devil's Notebook was read while sitting on the crapper at my girlfriend's (at the time) house. It was pretty much the only "me time" I got with two extrememly loud, obnoxious, and annoying little kids running around.

You will always find reading material in my bathroom.
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Hail Satan!


SETI@Home Team

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#154769 - 04/05/06 02:41 AM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: x9x]
Wile_E_Quixote Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 03/14/02
Posts: 2493
Never understood the whole idea of reading whilst hanging the brown bear in the porcelain cave. I mean, are most people constipated? It never takes me more than a couple of minutes.

Thinking whilst having a shit is just inviting shit thoughts.

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#154770 - 04/05/06 03:08 AM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: Wile_E_Quixote]
RandomStranger Offline
CoS Warlock

Registered: 03/09/05
Posts: 2770
Loc: Here.
Quote:

Never understood the whole idea of reading whilst hanging the brown bear in the porcelain cave. I mean, are most people constipated? It never takes me more than a couple of minutes.

Thinking whilst having a shit is just inviting shit thoughts.




It makes some people money:

click
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#154771 - 04/05/06 06:42 AM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: False_Messiah78]
DarkApollyon Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 10/18/05
Posts: 581
Loc: Brighton, England
Quote:

As I have posted on this before, all my best reading has been done while sitting on the throne.

In fact, the entirety of The Devil's Notebook was read while sitting on the crapper at my girlfriend's (at the time) house. It was pretty much the only "me time" I got with two extrememly loud, obnoxious, and annoying little kids running around.

You will always find reading material in my bathroom.




It's interesting that this thread should surface at this point in time - My current toilet reading is 'Satan Speaks' and before that 'The Devil's Notebook'!

Being a single parent myself I know what you mean about it being one of the few places you can get an uninterupted read! (- If I'm lucky that is! If I'm not I get him banging on the door shouting "I need to get in there now" - and "I can't hold it any longer", etc etc!!!! Oh well, just another of the joys of being a parent!)
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#154772 - 04/05/06 01:04 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: Wile_E_Quixote]
uncleherpe Offline


Registered: 03/22/05
Posts: 499
Quote:

Never understood the whole idea of reading whilst hanging the brown bear in the porcelain cave. I mean, are most people constipated? It never takes me more than a couple of minutes.

Thinking whilst having a shit is just inviting shit thoughts.




I dont like to think about what Im doing. Its usually not very pleasant.
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One stupid post too many.

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#154773 - 04/05/06 04:09 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: Mile_Highlander]
Kriss_Mistress Offline
User

Registered: 03/26/06
Posts: 131
My boyfriend used to bust in on me too. He always accused me of masturbating. Like that is the most romantic place in the world. What a moron.

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#154774 - 04/05/06 04:15 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: Kriss_Mistress]
RandomStranger Offline
CoS Warlock

Registered: 03/09/05
Posts: 2770
Loc: Here.
Quote:

My boyfriend used to bust in on me too. He always accused me of masturbating. Like that is the most romantic place in the world. What a moron.




Maybe he wanted to watch?
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#154775 - 04/05/06 04:25 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: RandomStranger]
Kriss_Mistress Offline
User

Registered: 03/26/06
Posts: 131
What is it with men and watching? Someone please explain this to me! It's like every time I'm with my girlfriend..."Can I watch?" No! *end of my rant*

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#154776 - 04/05/06 04:37 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: x9x]
tovasshi Offline


Registered: 02/16/05
Posts: 1415
Loc: Banana, Canada
You reminded me of my boyfriend. Everytime hes says something insightful or he has an idea he comes to me with:

"I was just on the can and I got this idea..."

"I was pitching a loaf and I was thinking..."

"Oh man, I just let out this huge log... anyways while I was in there..."

He fully admits he does his best thinking on the can.


And I too read shampoo and mosturizer bottles when I am on the can.
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#154777 - 04/05/06 04:43 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: uncleherpe]
Kriss_Mistress Offline
User

Registered: 03/26/06
Posts: 131
I'm usually reading FoxTrot. Jason has a mean streak that I'm in love with.

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#154778 - 04/05/06 05:03 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: Kriss_Mistress]
TrojZyr Offline
CoS Witch

Registered: 07/25/01
Posts: 12990
Loc: The Solid State
Ah, the divide between the sexes.

"What, you mean you don't wank off in the bathroom?"
_________________________
"Gentlemen, the verdict is guilty, on all ten counts of first-degree stupidity. The penalty phase will now begin."--Divine, "Pink Flamingos."

"The strong rule the weak, and the cunning rule over all." HS!

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#154779 - 04/05/06 05:20 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: toad]
Mile_Highlander Offline


Registered: 03/16/06
Posts: 224
Quote:

I've been thinking of building a bookshelf for in front of the crapper.
Also, I take the cordless in with me if nobody else is home.





That might be taking things a little too far, but hey, do watcha wanna do!

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#154780 - 04/05/06 05:28 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: Wile_E_Quixote]
dragondancer Offline

CoS Member

Registered: 12/22/04
Posts: 1546
Loc: Virginia
Quote:

Never understood the whole idea of reading whilst hanging the brown bear in the porcelain cave. I mean, are most people constipated? It never takes me more than a couple of minutes.

Thinking whilst having a shit is just inviting shit thoughts.




Maybe some people have to empty one end in order for the other end to work. Heh heh.

Disclaimer: Do not take offense to this unless the shoe fits.


Hail Satan!
_________________________
"It does take an exceptional mind and a still more exceptional integrity to remain untouched by the brain-destroying influences of the world's doctrines, the accumulated evil of the centuries-to remain human, since the human is the rational." Dr. Akston in Atlas Shrugged

"Not life, but good life, is to be chiefly valued." Socrates

Dragondancer
Temple of Vampire


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#154781 - 04/05/06 05:56 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: TrojZyr]
Kriss_Mistress Offline
User

Registered: 03/26/06
Posts: 131
If by bathroom you mean anyplace other than the shower then, no.

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#154782 - 04/05/06 06:16 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: Kriss_Mistress]
RandomStranger Offline
CoS Warlock

Registered: 03/09/05
Posts: 2770
Loc: Here.
Quote:

What is it with men and watching?




I don't know either... I'm more of a "hands-on" kind of person.

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#154783 - 04/05/06 06:19 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: RandomStranger]
Kriss_Mistress Offline
User

Registered: 03/26/06
Posts: 131
*grins* Much more fun that way, yes.

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#154784 - 05/09/06 11:34 PM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: x9x]
InquiringTruth Offline


Registered: 05/01/06
Posts: 14
I also meditate while utilizing the toilet.

The good lock and the comfortable seat aid my meditation by reducing the frequency of distractions.

In my restroom the medice chest mirror happens to be directly in front of the toilet. This positioning helps me to utilize the medition as a mean of self reflection. Am I living my life in a manner that expresses my love of life?

Thank you for the thought, x9x.

Hail Satan!

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#154785 - 05/10/06 11:03 AM Re: Toilet Seat Meditation [Re: Bill_M]
The_Sixth_Circle Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 10/06/04
Posts: 432
Loc: Hell; where else?
You know, I've often noticed what appears to be brilliance when someone really needs to go. I mean, have you seen it when someone gets really drunk, to the point of anal desperation and the look of revelation appears when the pressure "goes"?

Hmmm... I could be misreading the whole situation...

In saying that, the overall point of your post, Bill, is well made. Men and women seem to find the idea of sphincter toileting a particularly private thing. That being said, the amount of people I've come across who think that toileting is, in some way, amusing and/or clever, still amazes me.

It's quite natural, requires no effort (in fact, effort not to is sometimes expended) and is a necessity if one doesn't covet toxic shock. It's little wonder people find it meditative when you consider there is no intellectual engagement.

Well, other than:

HMMMMMNAAAAAAAAHHH!
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Truth, in matters of religion, is simply the opinion that has survived. - Sir Oscar Wilde

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