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#210488 - 12/24/06 02:37 PM An airport Xmas!
Evil_Eve Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 09/23/06
Posts: 4234
Loc: 1313 Mockingbird Lane
Infernal greetings dear readers.

I am at the Chicago airport. I currently find myself on a rampers laptop. (He was so gracious to offer it up to me) underneath this airport.

I am stuck stuck stuck here for the Holidays.

Okay, so what can I do to pass my on premise reserve time?

Something, ANYTHING besides hanging out in the United crew room with the Wackaloon Pilots and anal Flight Attendants who are currently discussing the exciting topic of 'nail polish' and facial treatments.

JOY!

I removed myself from that area and found myself with my family away from family. The Ramp Rats. I love em so.

I have been officially adopted and given a yellow United ramp jacket. This is nice. Okay things are a 'little better now'. I am accepted and my company appreciated.

It beats being over next door with the above mentioned flight crews.

There is a party going on here with over fifty dishes coming in. The Bears game is on, (we are winning) and I just purchased a new yes, NEW Carl Sagan book from the book store in terminal 5.

This book comes out to mark the ten year anniversary of Sagans death. His widow edited it.

Okay, things aren't so bad after all eh?

Food, 'friends', football and Sagan.

No!

Not enough.

I came up with an idea.

As much as I talk about my job, I thought I could 'show' you my job.

I am going to show you all the underbelly and inner workings of an airport.

From the ramp, to the planes, to the crew rooms, to the locker rooms to the WHOLE passenger experience from the eyes of..... a trapped flight attendant.

We will see the jokers in the crew room and I will TRY and find the most 'unique' passengers I can upstairs.

I plan to take my notepad and write down various arguments and fights from passengers who are delayed, or have their flights all together cancelled.

I might even witness a fist fight. It does happen during this time at airports.

I have started taking pictures which I will post at a later time.

Yes, I believe this will help pass the time in a most ammusing fashion.

People watching. One of my most favourite passtimes.

A camera only makes it all the more interesting.

Let the games begin.

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#210489 - 12/24/06 02:53 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Evil_Eve]
Lust Offline


Registered: 11/02/05
Posts: 4214
The movie 'Meet the Parents' was on earlier today, and I thought about you when Ben Stiller was having a momment with a flight attendant over not checking his bag.

I can only imagine the pictures that you could snap over this holiday season. I look forward to seeing them. Happy Holiday Evil Eve!
_________________________
�Love is one of the most intense feelings felt by man; another is hate. Forcing yourself to feel indiscriminate love is very unnatural. If you try to love everyone you only lessen your feelings for those who deserve your love. Repressed hatred can lead to many physical and emotional aliments. By learning to release your hatred towards those who deserve it, you cleanse yourself of these malignant emotions and need not take your pent-up hatred out on your loved ones.�
Anton Szandor LaVey, The Satanic Bible

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#210490 - 12/24/06 03:28 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Evil_Eve]
Sylph69 Offline
Banned

Registered: 12/14/06
Posts: 106
HAVE A HAPPY HOLIDAY--even if you are stuck at an airport.

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#210491 - 12/24/06 04:37 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Sylph69]
Evil_Eve Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 09/23/06
Posts: 4234
Loc: 1313 Mockingbird Lane
Thank you.

I just found out that I will be spending my X-mas day in South Carolina of all places.

At the very least, I will be warmer.

I got a few pictures so far. I have not ventured upstairs yet.

We got the cops called on us just a few minutes ago.

(Well, not 'me') the rampers that is.

They were outside on the ramp with a grill cooking up hot sausages, burgers and hotdogs when the tower spotted smoke from the grill.

Needless to say, the operation was quickly shut down.

Now they are in here grilling..
_________________________
Satan LIVES!
If you could....would YOU?



"Our religion does not require martyrs."
Magistra Nadramia.

FEARED!
Revered.
YOU can be a voice for the voiceless.


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#210492 - 12/24/06 04:58 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Evil_Eve]
Shade Offline
CoS Witch

Registered: 07/08/06
Posts: 6135
Loc: A Trailer Park
Wasn't there a t.v. show once (still playing?) called Airline or Airport or something? It was a reality show that followed Airport workers and all of the amazingly nasty shit they had to put up with, as well as some really poignant scenes. Anyway, I think I watched it once or twice because I love reality shows. But I had to stop watching it because the people who were mean to the Airport workers were SO MEAN it made me just want to punch the t.v. screen. I can't believe some of the absolutely off-the-wall muck that came out of those peoples mouths.

But people watching is one of my favourite past times as well.

Memoirs of a Trapped Flight Attendant.... I can see this expos climbing the top sellers list,

With pictures!

As Lex says - Happy Wholey Daze Lady....
_________________________
"What happens in the shadow, in the grey regions, also interests us all that is elusive and fugitive, all that can be said in those beautiful half tones, or in whispers, in deep shade." ~ The Brothers Quay

We're Just Regular People

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#210493 - 12/24/06 05:20 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Shade]
Zaftig Offline
CoS Witch

Registered: 09/23/06
Posts: 3406
Quote:

As Lex says - Happy Wholey Daze Lady....





It's supposed to be "Wholly Daze". Damn my lack of spell check!

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#210494 - 12/24/06 05:25 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Zaftig]
Shade Offline
CoS Witch

Registered: 07/08/06
Posts: 6135
Loc: A Trailer Park
Quote:

Quote:

As Lex says - Happy Wholey Daze Lady....





It's supposed to be "Wholly Daze". Damn my lack of spell check!





First MinusXIII' thing about the gators and now you. I can't stop laughing.... This and eggnog does not mix. Or perhaps it mixes a little too well - I seriously did not catch the typo either.

*adding "Wholey" to dictionary of made up words*
_________________________
"What happens in the shadow, in the grey regions, also interests us all that is elusive and fugitive, all that can be said in those beautiful half tones, or in whispers, in deep shade." ~ The Brothers Quay

We're Just Regular People

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#210495 - 12/24/06 05:49 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Evil_Eve]
Phineas Offline
CoS Magister

Registered: 08/16/06
Posts: 8269
What's with all the Happy Hoildays stuff? BAH, HUMBUG, I say!

(I trust you will make the best of it wherever you end up!)

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#210496 - 12/24/06 05:52 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Evil_Eve]
Discipline Offline
CoS Warlock

Registered: 08/25/03
Posts: 6796
Loc: Forever West
Ah, such is the life of the flight attendant.

Well, I wish you the best. Stay warm and keep reading those wonderful books. I find books to be the best companions.
_________________________
"I've learned . . . that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes." ~Andy Rooney

"At last I shall have time to devote myself seriously and freely to the destruction of all my former opinions." ~Descartes

The first principle is that you must not fool yourselfand you are the easiest person to fool. ~Richard Feynman

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#210497 - 12/24/06 05:57 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Shade]
Evil_Eve Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 09/23/06
Posts: 4234
Loc: 1313 Mockingbird Lane
Yes, there is a show called 'Airline' and it is operated by 'Southworst' oops....I mean Southwest airlines.

I must say this about that show: It is not always the passengers who have the problem.

I have noted Southwest FA's kicking someone off a plane or denying them from boarding the aircraft if they smelled ANY alcohol on the passengers breath.

This is ridiculous! I will toss off a disorderly DRUNK from the plane but not someone who is 'happy' or has had a drink prior to boarding.

I have seen some incredible things in my day (and some I wish I had not) such as the following:

On one particular episode of 'Airline' they opened a mans bags and a gazillion cockroaches poured out of it!

Yes, it is an interesting job.

Edit:

Thank you Dicipline. I hope your girlfriend is doing well.
Does she get to come home for the Holidays?


Edited by Evil_Eve (12/24/06 06:02 PM)

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#210498 - 12/24/06 06:01 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Evil_Eve]
Zaftig Offline
CoS Witch

Registered: 09/23/06
Posts: 3406
Quote:

On one particular episode of 'Airline' they opened a mans bags and a gazillion cockroaches poured out of it!




Sounds like my roomates laundry basket.

I leave this apartment in 89 hours, 26 minutes, and 3 seconds...

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#210499 - 12/24/06 06:06 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Phineas]
Evil_Eve Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 09/23/06
Posts: 4234
Loc: 1313 Mockingbird Lane
Thank you.

I seem to have inadvertantly skipped over your reply as well as Diciplines.

I think it's the fumes from outside on the ramp.
Currently I am playing MC here.

I wish they had some Nine Inch Nails. No such luck.
_________________________
Satan LIVES!
If you could....would YOU?



"Our religion does not require martyrs."
Magistra Nadramia.

FEARED!
Revered.
YOU can be a voice for the voiceless.


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#210500 - 12/24/06 06:19 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Evil_Eve]
Sylph69 Offline
Banned

Registered: 12/14/06
Posts: 106
Quote:

Thank you.

I just found out that I will be spending my X-mas day in South Carolina of all places.

At the very least, I will be warmer.





South Carolina is nice. I've been there but wouldn't want to live there...

Sounds like everyone is having fun.

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#210501 - 12/24/06 06:36 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Evil_Eve]
BlueHeeler Offline


Registered: 11/09/06
Posts: 110
Loc: Sydney, Australia
It can be very amusing watching the tensions rise of those celebrating Christmas.

I know how you feel Eve, as I am working a 12 hour day. I am sure to see a fist fight (or 2) and I know that I will be involved in breaking it up. I am always amused at how families can not hold it together for just one day.

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#210502 - 12/24/06 07:50 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: BlueHeeler]
Jeremiah Offline


Registered: 12/23/06
Posts: 25
Loc: Ohio
Correct if I'm wrong, but most airports have bars built-in, right?

And most airlines serve alcohol on board, right?

Somehow they justify refusing people to board due to alcohol consumption?

If that's not hypocrisy, I don't know what is.

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#210503 - 12/24/06 08:16 PM Be careful... [Re: Evil_Eve]
Linguascelesta Offline

CoS Warlock

Registered: 11/01/05
Posts: 2352
Loc: Europa
Don't get arrested for spying...

I remember some British tourists were arrested as spies a couple of years back in Greece, taking pictures at an airport...

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#210504 - 12/25/06 03:56 AM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Shade]
Cholinergic Offline
<B>CoS Member</B>

Registered: 04/16/05
Posts: 888
Loc: UK
I watched airline, it always made me laugh at how stupid some of the people were. The crap the staff had to put up with while still smiling and being professional was amazing - i'd hate to have their job and respect them a whole lot more.
_________________________
Yes, I named myself after a neurotransmitter

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#210505 - 12/25/06 03:59 AM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Jeremiah]
Cholinergic Offline
<B>CoS Member</B>

Registered: 04/16/05
Posts: 888
Loc: UK
Quote:

Correct if I'm wrong, but most airports have bars built-in, right?

And most airlines serve alcohol on board, right?

Somehow they justify refusing people to board due to alcohol consumption?

If that's not hypocrisy, I don't know what is.




Drinking in moderation is different from turning up to board a flight horrendously drunk and abusive to staff.
_________________________
Yes, I named myself after a neurotransmitter

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#210506 - 12/25/06 10:52 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Cholinergic]
Jeremiah Offline


Registered: 12/23/06
Posts: 25
Loc: Ohio
Quote:

Drinking in moderation is different from turning up to board a flight horrendously drunk and abusive to staff.




My post was in reference to this comment:

Quote:

I have noted Southwest FA's kicking someone off a plane or denying them from boarding the aircraft if they smelled ANY alcohol on the passengers breath.



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#210507 - 12/25/06 11:07 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Jeremiah]
BlueHeeler Offline


Registered: 11/09/06
Posts: 110
Loc: Sydney, Australia
Quote:

Quote:

Drinking in moderation is different from turning up to board a flight horrendously drunk and abusive to staff.




My post was in reference to this comment:

Quote:

I have noted Southwest FA's kicking someone off a plane or denying them from boarding the aircraft if they smelled ANY alcohol on the passengers breath.







Perception is the big issue here I believe. I know from experience when dealing with intoxicated people they will swear they are sober even though they can bearly stand or remember their own address.

It is likely that the person kicked off had done something more than merely having ANY alcohol to draw attention to themselves in order to be kicked off the flight.

Evil_Eve, any flight attendants, bartenders, nurses, police, or any member of the public for that matter does not need to deal with arrogance and obnoxious behaviour of intoxicated people.

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#210508 - 12/25/06 11:54 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: BlueHeeler]
Jeremiah Offline


Registered: 12/23/06
Posts: 25
Loc: Ohio
Quote:

It is likely that the person kicked off had done something more than merely having ANY alcohol to draw attention to themselves in order to be kicked off the flight.




My interpretation of Evil_Eve's comment was that people were being kicked or denied boarding simply for having the "smell" of alochol on their breath.

I would deduce that it is not likely they had done anything in addition to having a drink or two.

I recognized the hypocrisy of serving such drinks in the staging areas and even on the flights themselves, only to punish those whom choose to consume these drinks.

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#210509 - 12/26/06 10:25 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Jeremiah]
Evil_Eve Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 09/23/06
Posts: 4234
Loc: 1313 Mockingbird Lane
Quote:

Quote:

It is likely that the person kicked off had done something more than merely having ANY alcohol to draw attention to themselves in order to be kicked off the flight.




My interpretation of Evil_Eve's comment was that people were being kicked or denied boarding simply for having the "smell" of alochol on their breath.

I would deduce that it is not likely they had done anything in addition to having a drink or two.

I recognized the hypocrisy of serving such drinks in the staging areas and even on the flights themselves, only to punish those whom choose to consume these drinks.




Correct.

Myself as well as other pilots (every now and then) enjoy watching this show and mocking it in the crew room as it plays on the big screen Television.

There is a running joke that ye best not be having a wee bit of drink before ye be boarding one of their flights as ye will be tossed out on ye' ear aye!

I have met some Southwest FA's on various shuttle busses throughout the Country. I have even been invited to go to an interview with SW.

NO way, no how.

I oft times wonder if they teach them these harsh tactics in Ground School or if there are just FA's out there who want to 'make the show' and invent 'problems with passengers'.

I had a friend (fellow FA) who would love to make a sport of going over to the E terminal in the Philadelphia International Airport just to 'view' the passengers AND employees of SW.

He invited me once and I was taken back at what I saw.

In the line for TSA to get to said terminal, I was being told to walk through the metal detector.

I started to walk when some big guy in African garb nearly KNOCKED ME DOWN like a feather to cut in front of me.

Fellow FA had words with said man and TSA pulled him aside.

THIS was My first experience with the 'ghetto terminal' as it is fondly referred to by many in Aviation.

Next I saw a woman with rollers in her hair yelling at the top of her voice at a man named 'Charles'.

"CHARLES, get yo ass over here and quit foolin' around!"

I was dumbfounded that this activity was allowed in an airport terminal.

I saw employees who were unkempt. Shirts wrinkled and half way tucked in. Hair in cork screws.

I thought to Myself.. self? This is where it is all heading. It's a downward spiral from here Sista friend.

Next?

Next I saw a woman who looked much like 'Barney' the Purple Dinosaur (she was dressed in a purple moo moo and had a lovely pair of flip flops on).

Hey, 29 to 49 dollars for a one way ticket to Florida cannot be beat. I will admit that!

I cannot gas up my vehicle for that cost and DRIVE to Florida.

Gotta give it to SW. They put the low in lowbrow with their cheap fuel contract (soon to expire).

It used to be a 'privelage' to fly the friendly sky's.

Not anymore.

Remember when one would 'dress up' to fly? It was SPECIAL!

Now?

Now an aircraft is nothing but a Grey Hound with wings. ANYONE and I do mean anyone can fly.

Those who pick their noses and toenails at home, now do it on the aircraft!

They bring 'thier' environment onto the aircraft.

They bring it into MY workplace.

You would NOT believe the things I have witnessed from 'ghetto' passengers.

I Myself cannot believe some of the things I have witnessed with My own two personal peepers.

JEEPERS CREEPERS.

Back to the show 'Airline':

I remember watching one particular episode where they threw an old lady off the plane who had had a couple drinks. She wasn't falling down drunk mind you and no, she was not belligerent in any way shape or form.

They 'smelled it'. Ooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

So, in the end, they put her in a wheel chair (I do believe she had some type of hip surgery prior to this no go flight.) and had her wait in the terminal for the NEXT flight.

Sooooooooo your money is good here.. just not good here now?

Okay. If you say so.

In this job discretion is key. I pick My battles. No sense in stirring up someone over what is most likely nothing at all.

I Myself get 'feelings' about people and investigate before making hasty decisions.

I am reminded of a story I saw on CNN Headline News about a month or so ago.

We call it 'Freedom titty' in the airlines as it was a 'Freedom Airlines flight' that this occurred on.

The incident:

A woman was breast feeding her infant on board the aircraft.

Do I want to see this? Not really but hey, it's not illegal and I would do it in private. I would pick a place(such as in the lav) or underneath a blanket etc.

In any event as it were, a woman was feeding her child when an FA approached her and told her to put the titty away.

Husband of said woman became upset and said she had the legal right to whip out said titty to feed said infant.

Flight Attendant had couple and baby thrown off the aircraft.

She was later diciplined by her company.

Like I said, I pick My battles.

When I have drunken band members who are going to the lav every 20 minutes and grabbing another FA's arse while instructing Me to 'buckle their seat belts' while pointing to their crotch area and smiling?

When I have a loon telling Me that WE ARE TAKING HIM TO DETROIT NOW!!!!! at the top of his lungs in the gally?

When I have the above formentioned drunks apparently doing some type of narcotic in the lav?

Yes, I will rise to the occassion and have these lunatics arrested as My Passengers and crew could be in jeopardy.

If I see a little old lady who says hello to Me with Scotch on her breath who is not making a scene? No.

I have witnessed as such on this Television show.

I don't like to have people arrested.

Do you know what this means for Me and fellow crew members?

Possible diversion. It means PAPERWORK. It means filing various reports. It means possibly talking with the FAA and internal affairs.

It means being interviewed by several uniformed officers and being interviewed by our company.

It's a mess. I will only do so when My Passengers and crew are threatened.

On one of My flights not too very long ago (a month or two?) something like that, we had to have a couple of men arrested.

NOT FUN.

REALLY NOT FUN when the rest of their friends who were also on board (and did not get arrested) wind up at the same hotel that our crew was over-nighting in.

REALLY not fun when you are on a minimum rest overnight and spend a great deal of that rest period talking with the police and filing reports.

I am NOT that lady who will tell you for the umpteenth time to put your seat back up in it's full upright and locked posistion.

I will not repeatedly tell you to fasten your seat belt.

Ever hear of G force? I warned you and that is My only obligation. If you end up with a smashed skull it's your own fault and I won't feel sorry for you in any way shape or form.

Again, the word 'discretion' comes to mind.

I do have some wacky stories about hostile passengers and even CREW MEMBERS though that would keep you on the edge of your seat (including one that took place in Philadelphia) which involved an out and out beating to someone who deserved it right there in the E terminal.

Boy howdy that was a good story....

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#210510 - 12/26/06 10:46 PM Re: Be careful... [Re: Linguascelesta]
Evil_Eve Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 09/23/06
Posts: 4234
Loc: 1313 Mockingbird Lane
Quote:

Don't get arrested for spying...

I remember some British tourists were arrested as spies a couple of years back in Greece, taking pictures at an airport...




He most likely was not sporting a Navy Blue uniform whilst wearing a badge.

Aside from that? I am very nonchalant when it comes to the great 'art' of spying.

Yes, I have the microfilm.
_________________________
Satan LIVES!
If you could....would YOU?



"Our religion does not require martyrs."
Magistra Nadramia.

FEARED!
Revered.
YOU can be a voice for the voiceless.


Top
#210511 - 12/26/06 11:34 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Evil_Eve]
Chess Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 09/09/02
Posts: 1473
Loc: Chicago, IL USA
You know, I've always had great respect for flight attendants. It's not a job that I would ever want to try to tackle myself. I just wouldn't have the patience.

It's got to be hard enough waiting tables on the ground. That takes a good memory, physical coordination, and a natural sense of social engineering. To be a flight attendant must take all the skills of a top-notch server, plus a whole bunch of other dimensions. For one, it's physically impossible for the patrons to leave until a pre-determined time. And a percentage of them are absolutely terrified to be there, and might panic and do who-knows-what. The floor occasionally bounces around like it's on a tilt-o-whirl, and you're expected to handle this with grace and aplomb. When you finally go off duty at the end of the day, you're lucky to have a hotel room near the airport, instead of your own home. Oh, and you're responsible for the guests' safety should anything go wrong. Plus probably a whole bunch of other aspects I've never even thought of because I've never known the job from the inside. And for all this, the people in the seats seem to think it's your fault that they don't have as much legroom as they'd like, or that it's raining in New York.

My hat is off to you, m'lady. Your job makes the technical-support trenches seem like a day at the beach. I don't fly very often, but when I do, I make damned sure I smile at the attendants and thank them for my Coke and pretzels.

-Chess

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#210512 - 12/26/06 11:41 PM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Chess]
Evil_Eve Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 09/23/06
Posts: 4234
Loc: 1313 Mockingbird Lane
Quote:

You know, I've always had great respect for flight attendants. It's not a job that I would ever want to try to tackle myself. I just wouldn't have the patience.

It's got to be hard enough waiting tables on the ground. That takes a good memory, physical coordination, and a natural sense of social engineering. To be a flight attendant must take all the skills of a top-notch server, plus a whole bunch of other dimensions. For one, it's physically impossible for the patrons to leave until a pre-determined time. And a percentage of them are absolutely terrified to be there, and might panic and do who-knows-what. The floor occasionally bounces around like it's on a tilt-o-whirl, and you're expected to handle this with grace and aplomb. When you finally go off duty at the end of the day, you're lucky to have a hotel room near the airport, instead of your own home. Oh, and you're responsible for the guests' safety should anything go wrong. Plus probably a whole bunch of other aspects I've never even thought of because I've never known the job from the inside. And for all this, the people in the seats seem to think it's your fault that they don't have as much legroom as they'd like, or that it's raining in New York.

My hat is off to you, m'lady. Your job makes the technical-support trenches seem like a day at the beach. I don't fly very often, but when I do, I make damned sure I smile at the attendants and thank them for my Coke and pretzels.

-Chess




Thank you for the kind words.

It isn't Rocket Science but it is a bit more involved than most people would think. Mechanical failures? YOU SMILE knowing that you may be toast.

Trapped in a metal tube with a loon? SMILE! Because you know that others will panic.

This was the best one: A fire in flight with thick smoke. SMILE! You're on candid camera.

Oh no! Do NOT have a heart attack on me! Smile! You are in control.

I truly appreciate those passengers who DO in fact, smile.
I always give them extra pretzels.
_________________________
Satan LIVES!
If you could....would YOU?



"Our religion does not require martyrs."
Magistra Nadramia.

FEARED!
Revered.
YOU can be a voice for the voiceless.


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#210513 - 12/27/06 03:42 AM Re: An airport Xmas! [Re: Cholinergic]
blaskhyrk Offline


Registered: 04/11/06
Posts: 90
Loc: Poland
The xmass was everywhere, i don't like it too but what we can do with that.
_________________________
In Nomine Satanas

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