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#215718 - 01/16/07 09:22 AM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: Torquemada]
gypsy Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 07/04/01
Posts: 4749
Loc: Here
Quote:

The thing is that I do not consider love when someone feels butterflies in the stomach. Anyway, I do not feel that many years ago, and I am very happy with it. Sex and Friendship is the recipe. That also can lead to a partnership. But it has to be based on something rational with solid foundations. Otherwise, it will be in vain.




Well said! You are a wise man Torquemada
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#215719 - 01/16/07 10:06 AM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: Torquemada]
The_Lightning Offline


Registered: 05/21/06
Posts: 1325
Loc: Israel
I think falling in love is the most selfish feeling one can have for another person. Falling in love with someone is never about the other person- it's always about your fantasies, your needs.

Loving someone, on the other hand, is having respect for that person, knowing him for what he truly is and not what you want him to be- and cherishing it.

Love in the traditional, corny sense of it is nothing but a rush of young hormones that make you blind to reality.

Being "in love" is stupid, loving isn't.


Edited by The_Lightning (01/16/07 10:07 AM)
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#215720 - 01/16/07 10:12 AM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: gypsy]
Torquemada Offline


Registered: 11/11/06
Posts: 211
Loc: Spain&UK

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#215721 - 01/16/07 10:30 AM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: The_Lightning]
Torquemada Offline


Registered: 11/11/06
Posts: 211
Loc: Spain&UK
Well, that is a good point. Loving is difficult. To be in love is easy. In fact, it is too easy. And it is also not very elegant once you are more than 25 years old. I would even say more: to be in love is so vulgar and commonˇˇˇˇ (***)

However, I can love too. But my love is not the love of those people……..It is far better

(***) Please, do not misinterpret this affirmation and take it out of context. Of course, and as usual, I mean no disrespect to anyone.


Best,

Torquemada

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#215723 - 01/16/07 10:48 AM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: Quaark]
Torquemada Offline


Registered: 11/11/06
Posts: 211
Loc: Spain&UK
I wish i were 24. Then i could be inelegant againˇˇˇ.



Best,

Torquemada

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#215724 - 01/16/07 10:49 AM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: Torquemada]
Rory_Rocketpants Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 11/28/05
Posts: 1795
Loc: unknown
Quote:

I am a supporter of the L&F theory: Lust and Friendship. This is very good, at least for me. I still have many friends who have been my ex lovers. They all followed the L&F theory. We still keep in touch. With the few women “I loved or they loved me”, I have no relationship at all. It is dead.




I totally agree with this concept, though there are many (of my ex girlfriends) that do not.

Unlucky for them...

My best friend is a girl from college, we fucked constantly, that was it, no holding hands or going on romantic picnics.

We are still friends to this day, though I do miss her body, she is still a great friend, if we had "gone out" then it would have wrecked everything, I chose not to ask her out, even though she wanted to, I could see that it would go wrong eventually.

I made the right choice.

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#215728 - 01/16/07 11:34 AM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: Maya]
Mythil Offline


Registered: 01/06/07
Posts: 110
Loc: UK, Portsmouth
I think I should have wondered the title better. Anyway, it's not just love for a person you have sex with, it's love for that poor sod you bring in to the world, or love for yourself not getting onto that whole "welfare" mother/father state. Just because I say "love", doesn't mean it's for a husband/wife/girlfriend/boyfriend.
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#215729 - 01/16/07 01:03 PM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: Torquemada]
Doctor_Beat Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 08/06/06
Posts: 282
Quote:



I am a supporter of the L&F theory: Lust and Friendship. This is very good, at least for me. I still have many friends who have been my ex lovers. They all followed the L&F theory. We still keep in touch. With the few women “I loved or they loved me”, I have no relationship at all. It is dead. Therefore, get the hell out of there when they come with the bloody love. Leave it for them. It is not for me.





Wow, it's like you read my mind! This is my philosophy too, I only wish I had realised sooner....
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#215730 - 01/16/07 01:05 PM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: The_Lightning]
Bruja Offline

CoS Witch

Registered: 04/22/05
Posts: 2054
Loc: Atlanta, GA.
Quote:

Being "in love" is stupid, loving isn't.





I disagree.

I can concede, however, that I've seen my share of seemingly intelligent people revert to stupid, irrational, or infantile behavior.. all the while using "love" as an excuse (albeit a pathetic one).

It's a shame, really... as it seems that these characters are starting to give love a bad name.

As for me, though, I refuse to become jaded. I'm still a big fan of it all, and believe that a real and mature love is incredibly empowering, and can truly enrich a life.

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#215740 - 01/16/07 03:27 PM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: Bruja]
Roho_the_Rooster Offline
CoS Warlock

Registered: 03/10/05
Posts: 6999
Loc: Pre-Apocalypolis
The trick is for both parties to "fall in love" at the same time. After almost 17 years of "being in love", I can only say it is volitional...not something that hits you, beyond your control; and, takes work to maintain. But, it makes me happy, so it's worth it.
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#215741 - 01/16/07 03:35 PM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: The_Lightning]
Zaftig Offline
CoS Witch

Registered: 09/23/06
Posts: 3409
Quote:

Love in the traditional, corny sense of it is nothing but a rush of young hormones that make you blind to reality.





I actually like this rush. It's extremely rare for me. But when it does happen...watch out.

EDIT: And yes, love has made me jealous, stupid, and mean. But the sex was fucking awesome!

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#215742 - 01/16/07 03:54 PM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: Zaftig]
Shade Offline
CoS Witch

Registered: 07/08/06
Posts: 6135
Loc: A Trailer Park
Quote:

... love has made me jealous, stupid, and mean. But the sex was fucking awesome!




I'm not sure... is this the most brilliant pun I have ever seen? Yes... "the sex was fucking awesome"... Me likey.

A tiki for Lexi... Thanks for the chuckle!
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#215743 - 01/16/07 03:58 PM My unschooled theory of love [Re: Quaark]
The_Lightning Offline


Registered: 05/21/06
Posts: 1325
Loc: Israel
What I was talking about… is the fairy tale "knight on a white horse, coming to "save the princess" from a hideous monster (herself)"…. "and they live happily ever after"…. Riiiight.

Those I know who have experienced such "felling in love", winded up wanting to change each other and demanding impossible things from one another. No happy ending there.

I'm really sick of people falling in love with me, wanting me to change them or to change me. And there are so goddamn many of them!

Love, for me, is just being wholeheartedly with a person, having that intuitive feeling that you are both on the "same wave".
Not something that comes out of being "two halves that make a whole" but rather, being "two wholes" that make a new world between them.
"Falling in love" I view as something desperate and needy (in a suffocating manner).
While love is just magnetism between two, independent beings.
It's just a very intimate friendship, with sexuality on top.

Ya' know? =P
I'm not sure we are even in a disagreement about the nature of the concept as much as how we term it…




(-This was 60 seconds of Little Miss Lightning's weekly "philosophical-spree"-
-Thank you for reading, and have a nice day!- ~smile~)
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#215747 - 01/16/07 09:20 PM Re: Love is dead, long live lust! [Re: Zaftig]
redheadgrl Offline


Registered: 09/24/06
Posts: 273
Quote:

Quote:

Love in the traditional, corny sense of it is nothing but a rush of young hormones that make you blind to reality.





I actually like this rush. It's extremely rare for me. But when it does happen...watch out.

EDIT: And yes, love has made me jealous, stupid, and mean. But the sex was fucking awesome!




I agree 100% with you lexiphanic!!!!!

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#215748 - 01/16/07 09:45 PM Re: My unschooled theory of love [Re: The_Lightning]
redheadgrl Offline


Registered: 09/24/06
Posts: 273
Quote:

I'm really sick of people falling in love with me, wanting me to change them or to change me. And there are so goddamn many of them!




This is my cue to come up with a good excuse for a sudden exit (this kind of conversation is futile and is really just a type of power struggle, of which I refuse to participate). He might be smart enough to hesitate before bring up certain topics if such conversations results in a Houdini act.

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