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#410942 - 02/01/10 01:55 PM Re: Hi. Here are my testicles. I don't need them. [Re: Roho_the_Rooster]
I'mPerfecting Offline

Registered: 02/03/08
Posts: 221
Loc: Florida
I'm sorry I didn't mean to ruin the "MYSTERY OF THE FRIDGE" for you. Look on the bright side now your free to discover other mysteries like..
What part of the egg is the top?
Which way it the correct way to put the toilet paper on the holder?
How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?

As for it being "street smarts", I almost wrote that very same sentence. smile
"...And the truth that makes us laugh, will make you cry!"
"...Porcelain in a paper cup world."
~Almost Alice~

#410949 - 02/01/10 03:57 PM Re: Hi. Here are my testicles. I don't need them. [Re: NapalmNick]
TrojZyr Offline
CoS Witch

Registered: 07/25/01
Posts: 12990
Loc: The Solid State
Originally Posted By: NapalmNick
In a nutshell: Folks have this unique sensation online. They know for a fact that whatever they post is guaranteed to be seen by a significant amount of people, and yet they are literally alone in a room while doing it. So they go ahead and spill their guts. And it is considered socially acceptable. This same behavior becomes their personal advertisement in the real world.

Well, and in real life, various rules and social cues typically stop us from divulging highly personal information. On the Internet, in addition to often being anonymous (one assumes), one also doesn't receive those signals and cues that would typically give one pause before sharing some nugget of information. The Internet often doesn't feel like a "real" conversation, in other words--and, it seems that the Internet (and talk and reality television, too) have spilled out into the real world.

(It could be that everybody's sessions with their therapists have spilled out into reality, too.)

Add that to the fact that it's traumas, drama, and tragedies that get people on reality shows and talk shows and on the front covers of the tabloids and on the top of the hit list on YouTube. All-too-rarely and all-too-briefly are people rewarded for being sane, competent, stable, and normal.

Because of these and various other factors, it seems that narcissism is on the rise. More people than ever seem to believe more strongly than ever that they DESERVE to be the center of attention, and will absolutely DIE if it doesn't happen. At that rate, negative attention is better than no attention at all.

That the overall pace of life seems to have accelerated considerably in the past decade or so means that it is actually harder to grab someone's undivided attention for any amount of time. Try to have a nice heart-to-heart with somebody, and whoops, within 30 seconds, they have to answer a text, or they have to answer a phone call, or they have to run here or there. So, you have to work harder for those little nuggets of consideration and attention, and you have to squeeze every last drop out of them while you have them.

So, there you have it.

Well, and I've noticed that the more "emo-ness" is rewarded or lauded (whether implicitly or explicitly), the more people ignore or even chafe at "non-emo-ness," especially overt pride or confidence. I've had to learn how to speak "emo," just to be able to communicate with sad-sacks and pathetic losers who can't hear anything else! (On a less extreme or dramatic note, though, note that just generally knowing how to appropriately commiserate with folks about this-or-that is just good social skills, and good Lesser Magic. Meeting someone's crummy news with good news is bad manners. )

Edited by TrojZyr (02/01/10 04:09 PM)
"Gentlemen, the verdict is guilty, on all ten counts of first-degree stupidity. The penalty phase will now begin."--Divine, "Pink Flamingos."

"The strong rule the weak, and the cunning rule over all." HS!

#410954 - 02/01/10 04:21 PM Re: Hi. Here are my testicles. I don't need them. [Re: Nemo]
TrojZyr Offline
CoS Witch

Registered: 07/25/01
Posts: 12990
Loc: The Solid State
Originally Posted By: Nemo
Your filters are clearly in place.

Finding worthwhile social contacts is like panning for gold.

Much of the dross gets tossed back into the stream.

Absolutely! To that, I'd add that, in my experience, one must also learn to compartmentalize.

That is, I tend to move within and without a very diverse system of social groups. I recognize that Group 1 fulfills Purposes and Needs A, E, and F, but not B, C, and D, and that Group 2 fulfills Purposes and Needs B and D only, and actually sabotages or undermines A and E, and so on and so forth. You have to learn what to expect (more-or-less) from certain individuals and certain groups, and then try not to get too upset when they fall short of some ultimate standard.

(Though, some amount of annoyance, frustration, or dismay may be standard and expected, especially when you're dealing with people to whom you are closely connected. The point is, don't let it consume or overwhelm you, especially if you've dealt with an individual or group long enough to know how they operate.)
"Gentlemen, the verdict is guilty, on all ten counts of first-degree stupidity. The penalty phase will now begin."--Divine, "Pink Flamingos."

"The strong rule the weak, and the cunning rule over all." HS!

#410968 - 02/01/10 06:09 PM Re: Hi. Here are my testicles. I don't need them. [Re: Skjalandir]
Nammu Offline

CoS Member

Registered: 10/18/09
Posts: 402
Loc: Pacific NW
Originally Posted By: Skjalandir
I have noticed a lot of people making sure that I know that they cannot read or write, or that they have depression, or that they have ‘ADHD’, or that their children have ‘ADHD’, or that they have been raped, or have had an abortion, or in one really mind-boggling conversation, that they have killed people on military duty and are involved in a government cover-up due to the whole squad committing suicide, bar the one who told the story who wants to commit suicide.

All of these things had been confessed to me at ONE social gathering.

Skjalandir, you're very patient to listen to all the little sad Sams.

I've observed a trend with the local folk (in the US) they seem to have much more
sympathy for the squeaking whiny wheel than the strong silent type.

Originally Posted By: Skjalandir

I came away not knowing what anyone’s talents were, what they enjoyed in life, and I didn’t learn a damn thing apart from people are becoming pussys.

Sad and true. And they love you for listening to them, remember that.

#411094 - 02/03/10 11:38 AM Re: Hi. Here are my testicles. I don't need them. [Re: Nammu]
Witch_Scarlet Offline

CoS Witch

Registered: 01/09/06
Posts: 789
Loc: Texas
I love it when people reveal their deepest weaknesses to me without my having to ask or do anything to find out what they are. That way I know what to use to control them should the need arise. ~smile~

#411378 - 02/06/10 01:58 AM Re: Hi. Here are my testicles. I don't need them. [Re: Skjalandir]
Machismo Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 02/05/10
Posts: 1132
Loc: New Jersey
Originally Posted By: Skjalandir
I still do not think their company outweighs being an agony aunt, though. Maybe if I were on chat show host's wage...

Agony aunt. Nice phrase! Never heard it before.

Big reason I came to this forum is that I knew the emo crowd wouldn't last long here. Prey animals are for target practice. For conversation I want lions, wolves, and foxes.

#411568 - 02/07/10 04:05 PM Re: Hi. Here are my testicles. I don't need them. [Re: Zaftig]
SINClair Offline

Registered: 10/06/08
Posts: 320
Loc: Europe
I don't think it matters to them whether the person is interested in hearing their stories or not.

There's a girl that I work with who's a nightmare to be around on that regard. Gladly I do not work with her every day of the week, but every time that I do, she will spend the whole day telling me in the smallest details how a certain day was.

She will tell me about a conversation she had with her boyfriend and she will repeat the dialogues word for word, she will tell me what they had for dinner, what his mother told them over dinner, and she'll go as far as detailling how sex with her boyfriend was that night, down to the most intimate parts.

We are not even friends, we are work collegues, and never, for not a moment whatsoever, have I shown slight interest in hearing her stories. Quite the contrary, I do everything to show I wish she'll stop speaking.

I start playing with my phone, I open a book, I even leave the room making a comment that would politely put an end to the "conversation"... All to no avail. She will follow me to the next room and restart again:

"... then I folded the sleeve on his shirt and his mother told me how wonderful I am, because his ex-wife would never do such thing... His ex-wife doesn't even cook, she buys frozen dinners..."


To me it seems like these sort of characters only do things in their lives to get acceptance from people, to impress people, as opposed to doing things to please themselves and make themselves happy.

That's why they can't just keep a happy moment to themselves or share them with only close ones who actually care and would be happy for them too. They have to shove it down everyone's throat, just to prove they too can do it.

It is very fucking sad. What a waste of energy. What a waste of space.

Just as bad as to hear their woes.
"Wer Nichts Wagt, Kann Nichts Verlieren"

#411703 - 02/08/10 01:17 PM Re: Hi. Here are my testicles. I don't need them. [Re: Skjalandir]
Insurgent Offline
CoS Witch

Registered: 08/08/01
Posts: 2331
I blame pop-psychology for the most part. In the western world it has become cliche to be diagnosed with some sort of mental illness. In 2009 I met no less than 50 different people who all claimed to have bi-polar, MPD, mild autism and/or dyslexia.

All of these people: lazy, ineffectual piece of shit slob sons of bitches who couldn't muster it in real life.

The bi-polar people are really just too immature to handle adult situations.

Those with MPD are really just too boring to be honest.

Those with "mild autism" are often just too pussified to be the life of any party, even the lamest of D&D sessions.

Those with dyslexia never read, never write and when they do they are usually too high off a bong hit to give a fuck about even remotely proper English. "I'm not good at spelling because of dyslexia!" and I have to ask, when did you last read a book?

Pop-psychology and psychiatry has given them an out to being real men and women. They've been taught that if you've got some type of disorder then that forgives you for being an idiot.

Further, they've also been taught by pop-psychology that it's somehow a good thing to always talk about your feelings. It isn't. Internalize them and then shit them out because they don't amount to anything unless you can actually do something real about a tangible problem.

This mutated at what is now the height of the internet so now people who haven't even attended a pop-psychology session can be educated on how to pass yourself off as damaged goods in order to avert attention away from real flaws like laziness, educational deficiency and unhealthy amounts of marijuana usage.

It aggravates me so much that I bordeline buy the Scientologist view on psychiatry, but no.

Good post.
My site:

"My dear Insurgent you're an extremist, intolerant and you have prejudices. That's all."

"I am a fucking Satanist and desire in all of my being to be the Queen of the World if at all possible...."

#411710 - 02/08/10 02:31 PM Re: Hi. Here are my testicles. I don't need them. [Re: Insurgent]
Skjalandir Offline

Registered: 12/07/09
Posts: 92
Loc: England
Now that was one heck of a read! Thank you for sharing. coopdevil
Einstein can't be classed as witless
He claimed atoms were the littlest
When you did a bit of splittingen-ness
Frighten everybody shitless
- Ian Dury

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