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#411140 - 02/03/10 09:37 PM I think it's about time for a ritual.
Herr_S Offline


Registered: 12/25/08
Posts: 76
Loc: Mordor
The thing I've had most difficult to accept with the satanic philosophy/religion is the ritual part. I haven't really seen the use for it, until now. Let me tell you that the situation I am in now is very complex and I won't go into detail about it, but I will tell you in broader terms the about it. There is a close relative to me that I am forced to deal with on a regular basis. I have shown this person my utmost compassion and respect, in return she has manipulated me and people around me. Everytime there is a disagreement between us, I act calmly and rationally in response she screams and spits until she get whatever is the issue her way. I know that if I would respond screaming and spitting, the situation would only get worse so I usually let her get it her way. One time she openly told me that she would parasite off me the rest of my life. It has gotten to the point where she has hurt me both emotionally and financially and there is no way that I can avoid this situation.

I've often played with the thought of where the line goes when someone would actually deserve a destruction ritual, and there's always been a voice in the back of my head saying: "it's not worth it, back off and make the best of the situation". I am now in a situation that I cannot avoid, where my feelings of anger towards this person is literally consuming me, I can't sleep, I don't eat properly, I walk around with this burden and I need to get rid of it. The voice in the back of my head has faded away. I have lost all respect and compassion of this person and the only reason I keep up the act is to make the best out of the situation. But I cannot go around with these feelings of anger much longer, I hate it. I hate being angry, it's the worst feeling.

I cannot reason with this person and I cannot meet her in an open confrontation. That is why I am seriously considering a destruction ritual, so that I can at least get rid of the anger, if anything would happen as a consequence of this ritual, honestly I would be relieved. I am posting this because I would like to hear the opinions of more experienced Satanist. Would you act accordingly to what I am considering to do?
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Each misdirected act of compassion is a waste of magical energy.

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#411141 - 02/03/10 10:12 PM I don't think so. [Re: Herr_S]
Nemo Offline
CoS Magister

Registered: 10/06/02
Posts: 12579
Loc: Point Nemo s48:52:31:748, w123...
Quote:
...and there is no way that I can avoid this situation.


Are you certain?

(I am speaking here of entirely legal solutions of course, by the way).

There is usually a price to be paid to get out of a box, though most people will simply pay rent forever and stay in the box rather than pay the price.

The box is familiar though uncomfortable.

You have been able to afford the rent so far.

Your hesitations in all of this with regard to using a ritual (to include posting this question for others' opinions) indicates to me that you do not think a ritual would work for you ...which effectively kills it from working for you.

So if you are unwilling to pay the price, and ritual is not your cup of tea, what you are asking is "What can I do to not have to feel this anger".

If my assessment is correct, then you might benefit from studying the numerous self-help works of the late Dr. Albert Ellis, the creator of RET, Rational Emotive Therapy (later REBT), and the author of A Guide to Rational Living.

Paraphrasing the Greek Stoic philosopher Epictetus, it isn't what happens to you in life that makes you feel angry, it is what you tell yourself about it that makes you feel angry. If you can truthfully tell yourself something different, you will come to feel different. This is what Ellis taught.

And, good luck!

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#411142 - 02/03/10 10:23 PM Re: I think it's about time for a ritual. [Re: Herr_S]
NapalmNick Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 08/23/08
Posts: 2153
Well, with this being a close relative you might feel bad if she does in fact become injured or worse. I know that's not how you feel now, but things like that can change your opinion pretty fast.

My advice would be to modify the litany of said destruction ritual to not explicitly imply any kind of bodily harm or death. Then, if something really bad does happen, you can safely assume it did not have any connection with your ritual and go on without any unnecessary guilt.

Normally I would not go into too much detail about magic upstairs, but this seems somewhat important, so I will give a condensed version of a personal experience here for contextual purposes.

When I was about 16, (same age I read TSB) I associated with a kid who was a complete and utter dick. It got to the point at one time he threatened my life. I tried my best to stay away from him, but he would sometimes run into me at school, and it only got worse. He was one of the "showman" types. Really inflated ego, always had to prove he was a big punk rock macho man.

One day, alone in my room, I said the following sentence: "Sometimes I wish he would just die."

That same night he flipped his car going over 100 mph on a straight dirt road and was flung out the window (he wasn't wearing his seat-belt). His car looked like a crushed coke can. He was in the hospital for nearly a month.

I've heard that he's shaped up quite a bit since. Joined the Marines, and lives in another state. Other than that I really don't care.

My point is there was no ritual. I have no concrete proof that my little sentence did that, in fact I highly doubt it, but it is a pretty big coincidence. In either case, an asshole is out of my life for good.

Your call. Just mind your words.
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"May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house." --George Carlin, Playin' With Your Head

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#411144 - 02/03/10 10:26 PM Re: I think it's about time for a ritual. [Re: Herr_S]
S810 Offline


Registered: 02/11/06
Posts: 326
Loc: northwest
I would suggest you use a different route, for example, if this person is someone you actually love. I personally have had very good results with destruction rituals. Consequently I have only performed three. You could much more easily stop having contact with this person. Cut off all ties so to speak, essentially that is what you will want to do after said ritual anyway. I know after i throw a destruction ritual at an enemy, the last place i wanna be is in their presence. Which is usually the reason I've performed the ritual to begin with.

I have a sister who is very dramafied and almost impossible to get along with. She has stabbed me metaphorically in the back countless times. However, I don't wish her dead. Instead I keep her at a football fields length. She can't borrow money, I won't watch her kids unless I ask for them. I despise the type of being she has become almost to the point of being embarassed to be related to her. But, she is my sister and I cannot have certain things happen to her because she is the mother of my 3 nephews. And being a Satanist, I know that I need not subject myself to her.

Use emotion to throw your curse for it will energize the ritual effectively, however use your brain to decide if this is the best possible solution. Just my two cents.


Edited by S810 (02/03/10 10:28 PM)
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#411150 - 02/03/10 11:33 PM Re: I think it's about time for a ritual. [Re: S810]
Herr_S Offline


Registered: 12/25/08
Posts: 76
Loc: Mordor
I would like to thank you all for your answers, I have read them through and I shall try to answer you all.

Nemo: There is no legal way for me to get out of the box in at least a couple of years, and even then the price would be very costly. But the walls sure are closing in on me.

I do agree with you that my hesitation towards a ritual would probably destroy any effect it would have. It's my scepticism that's stopping me.

I want to be able to act rationally in my own best interest at all times, but my emotions are hindering me. I will look into Ellis work, and I will give it a try. Just posting this thread was a short sense of relief though.

NapalmNick: Honestly, I just don't want to have anything to do with this person. She knows that I am more successful than her so she wants to stick on to me like a parasite. The way she manipulates me is by doing one small favour and then asking tenfold in return. She can act nicely for short times, but that's just because there's something she wants from me and if I say no she goes completely mad, and that's when you realize all she did before was just an act. If there was any way we could go separate paths, I would do so, but this is an unusual situation.

S810: If I could, I would do the exact same thing as you do to your sister. I cannot get out of the situation and I am not sure a ritual would work for me. The problem is the anger that I am experiencing, it's hindering me from living my life to the fullest extent. She is the root of the problem, but I cannot get rid of her, what I want to get rid of the anger at least.
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Each misdirected act of compassion is a waste of magical energy.

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#411151 - 02/04/10 12:01 AM Re: I think it's about time for a ritual. [Re: Herr_S]
SteelAndStone Offline


Registered: 01/09/10
Posts: 40
Loc: California
Originally Posted By: Herr_S
I've often played with the thought of where the line goes when someone would actually deserve a destruction ritual, and there's always been a voice in the back of my head saying: "it's not worth it, back off and make the best of the situation".

I used to have a voice like that myself. I will make a long story short and tell you that in my case, the voice in my head told me to back off because on some level, I was aware that the people I was angry at were not the real problem--the real problem was my own insecurity at the time, and my inability to deal with those people in a mature manner. (Keep in mind, I was 16 at the time, and very much in the mad-at-the-world people-should-fuck-off-and-die angry teenager phase.) Point being: the problem was really me, not them. I devoted my energy to improving myself, my anger faded, and I haven't heard that voice since.

Originally Posted By: Herr_S
I have shown this person my utmost compassion and respect, in return she has manipulated me and people around me. Every time there is a disagreement between us, I act calmly and rationally in response she screams and spits until she get whatever is the issue her way...

...One time she openly told me that she would parasite off me the rest of my life. It has gotten to the point where she has hurt me both emotionally and financially and there is no way that I can avoid this situation.

You, on the other hand, are angry because of a genuine attack. You have responded calmly and maturely, to no avail. This person HAS harmed you, and has openly declared her intention to continue harming you on a long-term basis. A clear-cut case of someone deserving to be cursed.

Nevertheless, that voice is in your mind, causing you to question whether or not a curse is a good solution. Personally, I've learned to listen to the small voices in my mind, because they're always on the money--but I can't speak for your voices, or their accuracy.

Magister Nemo made a good point already--if you try to curse this person with any doubt about whether or not you should, it will likely fail. However, the anger you feel is obviously taking a toll on you, and it may be clouding your thinking.

Quote:
When quarreling with someone who is dear to you, transfer your mutual wrath to someone you dislike, and you will be surprised at the results. --Anton Szandor LaVey, in The Devil's Notebook

If you want to get rid of your anger, but are reluctant to curse the individual in question, you might give this a try. I often find that a ritual to release emotion, followed by real-world action undertaken with a calm mind, is a powerful solution to whatever problem I face. While you may not be able to escape the box (yet), you may think of a few ways to make it more livable.

Hope you can glean something useful from this long-winded post. smile
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#411158 - 02/04/10 01:41 AM Re: I think it's about time for a ritual. [Re: Herr_S]
Nammu Offline

CoS Member

Registered: 10/18/09
Posts: 402
Loc: Pacific NW
If her life situation was to improve do you think it would influence the way she treats you?
If so, have you considered a compassion ritual to bring happiness into her life
instead of a destruction ritual?

Because you are unable to separate yourself from her for the time-being, the compassion ritual could
ultimately be very self-serving wink.

If you have an idea of what would bring happiness into her life that would be very helpful.

My concern with the destruction ritual is that it has great potential to negatively impact both of you.

One more idea-if you were to avoid accepting favors from her would this prevent the vicious cycle described earlier?


Edited by Nammu (02/04/10 01:44 AM)

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#411159 - 02/04/10 02:06 AM Re: I think it's about time for a ritual. [Re: Herr_S]
John Prophet Offline

CoS Member

Registered: 04/06/09
Posts: 995
Loc: My suburban lair

ďThat is why I am seriously considering a destruction ritual, so that I can at least get rid of the anger, if anything would happen as a consequence of this ritual, honestly I would be relieved.Ē

Well, there you have it!

Another thing to remember is that you should not force yourself to like this person, just because sheís related to you. If you truly dislike or hate someone and you feel a destruction ritual might help (even just in the psychological sense), then I say go for it.

What this really all comes down to is knowing yourself well enough to know what you really want. But donít get caught in the trap of thinking that youíre supposed to like someone, who you actually donít. Iíve had to deal with that before and itís always self destructive. Either way, just be honest with yourself and know that you have a right to the way you feel regardless of other peopleís standards and social expectations. Donít beat yourself up for hating someone. Assuming that youíre a good judge of character, they probably deserve it.


Edited by John Prophet (02/04/10 02:10 AM)
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#411163 - 02/04/10 04:05 AM Re: I think it's about time for a ritual. [Re: Herr_S]
Spelled Moon Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 12/25/08
Posts: 1691
Loc: Germany
Maybe this thread could be helpful for you: Using rituals in regards to drug-abuses.
It is not exactly about your problem, but I think some ideas (especially by Magister Phineas) could help you in finding of your solution.

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#411169 - 02/04/10 07:14 AM Re: I don't think so. [Re: Nemo]
Roho_the_Rooster Offline
CoS Warlock

Registered: 03/10/05
Posts: 6999
Loc: Pre-Apocalypolis
Originally Posted By: Nemo


Paraphrasing the Greek Stoic philosopher Epictetus, it isn't what happens to you in life that makes you feel angry, it is what you tell yourself about it that makes you feel angry. If you can truthfully tell yourself something different, you will come to feel different. This is what Ellis taught.



And it works.

I am not familiar with the work of Ellis. It sounds like reframing...being in control of how you percieve a situation to put yourself in the best position to deal with it effectively.
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#411171 - 02/04/10 07:19 AM Re: I think it's about time for a ritual. [Re: Herr_S]
M.D. Roche Offline
Banned

Registered: 11/08/09
Posts: 513
Loc: Albany, New York
Go for it and tell us about the results (internal or external). I'd be interested in your experience, seeing as how this would be your first ritual.

One of my favorite phrases comes to mind: Don't talk about it, be about it!
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#411194 - 02/04/10 02:54 PM Re: I don't think so. [Re: Roho_the_Rooster]
Nemo Offline
CoS Magister

Registered: 10/06/02
Posts: 12579
Loc: Point Nemo s48:52:31:748, w123...
Albert Ellis was a psychologist who studied classical psychoanalysis and then was hugely dissatisfied with the lack of positive results that came from that therapy.

As a consequence he basically fathered what is now known as cognitive behavioral therapy which assumes that what is happening now is more important than what happened in the past and that you can learn to change how you view things to alter your emotional responses to it. That is by no means a precise definition but more of a working synopsis.

Albert Ellis was also something of a pistol. He once debated Nathanial Branden when Brandon was the posterchild for Ayn Rand's Objectivism. When the Objectivists in the audience behaved boorishly during the debate two outcomes resulted. Brandon was embarrassed by their behavior and Ellis wrote an entire book Is Objectism A Religion - which really ticked off the Objectivists who prided themselves as being atheists, ...and which was exactly what Ellis intended. wink

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#411196 - 02/04/10 03:26 PM Re: I think it's about time for a ritual. [Re: Herr_S]
Callier Offline

CoS Warlock

Registered: 08/30/06
Posts: 2209
Goddamn man I really need to write a book for men on how to KEEP YOUR PIMP HAND STRONG!

When I say "Keep your pimp hand strong!" I'm saying GROW SOME BALLS, communicate with fierce and don't let anyone make you feel like a little bitch.

BE A MAN! Talk to her, let her know how you really feel and don't be all scared and shit.

If she ain't with that then give her ass a 30 day notice. Family or not. Don't let anyone treat you like that especially in your own crib.
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#411200 - 02/04/10 04:09 PM In Addition. [Re: Nemo]
Unknown Offline
Unknown

Registered: 03/31/05
Posts: 1649
Quote:
Your hesitations in all of this with regard to using a ritual (to include posting this question for others' opinions) indicates to me that you do not think a ritual would work for you ...which effectively kills it from working for you.


Magister Sass also explains in his book ESSAYS IN SATANISM that when one has conflicting emotions even on an unconscious level it can in fact prohibit your ritual from having the desired outcome. Dr. LaVey gave fair warning in The Satanic Bible as to making sure you WANT to do the ritual before proceeding with it. Otherwise you may see the opposite of your desired ritual taking place. wink

So now you have the word of advice from three magicians in regards to that.
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#411201 - 02/04/10 04:16 PM Re: I think it's about time for a ritual. [Re: Herr_S]
Unknown Offline
Unknown

Registered: 03/31/05
Posts: 1649
Quote:
One time she openly told me that she would parasite off me the rest of my life. It has gotten to the point where she has hurt me both emotionally and financially and there is no way that I can avoid this situation.


If she is parasitizing off of you it is because you are allowing her to do such a thing. Obviously you gave a very vague description so it is hard to give an accurate answer.

Really it all comes down to responsibility in my opinion. Whose responsible for being in the situation you are in? Is it her or is it you? That is where you will find your answer.
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#411318 - 02/05/10 06:11 PM Re: I think it's about time for a ritual. [Re: Herr_S]
Machismo Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 02/05/10
Posts: 1132
Loc: New Jersey
Originally Posted By: Herr_S
Would you act accordingly to what I am considering to do?


Why not? Hell, she's a parasite for goatsake. Two more:

Quote:

...and there is no way that I can avoid this situation.


Why not? One more:

Quote:
...and I cannot meet her in an open confrontation.


Why not?

Do the ritual. It'll help you shit out the poisons in your head.
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