#411693 - 02/08/10 02:21 PM
Re: How many kids do YOU want?
[Re: Bill_M]
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Registered: 03/20/07
Posts: 68
Loc: Canada
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#411694 - 02/08/10 02:25 PM
Re: How many kids do YOU want?
[Re: Original Sly]
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Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 92
Loc: Montana, USA
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I think that I would like two. I know I want at least one, and I'll decide on the second after the first comes along (barring interesting luck such as twins, which would be okay with me).
I know I want to be a parent (not yet, but I do). I think siblings are good, and I've known far too many only children who resented their parents and were unhappy as children for being too lonely. I also think it would be good to have few enough children that a single parent can keep one hand on each child, or both parents together could carry all children. Therefore, two seems good.
~Branwyn
_________________________
The trouble with being a god is that you've got no one to pray to.
-- (Terry Pratchett, Small Gods)
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#411696 - 02/08/10 02:33 PM
Re: How many kids do YOU want?
[Re: Branwyn]
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Registered: 10/04/08
Posts: 112
Loc: Derbyshire, England
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Nope, no kids for me thankyou! There's no way on earth anyone could persuade me to go through pregnancy and labour, only to be responsible for another human being. And, due to the influences you exert over that child, you are probably going to be responsible for its actions and the way it thinks for the rest of its life, not just until it reaches eighteen or twenty-one years of age. I've had all sorts of insults levelled at me for being a woman who doesn't want children, but these days I just ignore such stupidity. As if it's not my choice whether to have kids, and how many? But yes, even in the vastly overpopulated UK, I am feeling the societal pressure to have kids. But i resist, because as far as I could see, they would never appear in my own future. I never even got broody as a younger woman when freinds had babies, all I could think of was "Well, there goes your individual identity - from now on you'll be (insert kid's name) mother. Not (insert your name) anymore." Not for me.
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#411709 - 02/08/10 04:23 PM
Re: How many kids do YOU want?
[Re: Bill_M]
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Banned
Registered: 11/08/09
Posts: 513
Loc: Albany, New York
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I've seen some horrible reasons by the same demographic for intentionally having children. I've known women who tried getting pregnant to force a man into staying in the relationship with them. I've known couples who never really talked it through, and both just assumed that having children was what the other partner wanted. There's also pressure from "friends" and family members who want to be grandparents. And I've seen people who just assume that establishing a family was just the naturally next thing to do after getting a career and a house. What really disturbs me are couples who think that having children will help save their marriage. Of course it doesn't and the child/ren ends up having to live through a divorce, which can lead to all sorts of other issues.
_________________________
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#411762 - 02/08/10 10:17 PM
Re: How many kids do YOU want?
[Re: Original Sly]
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Registered: 10/24/08
Posts: 380
Loc: Cthulhu's Bowels,Kentucky
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If one believes himself to be the elite, to possess an intellect and abilities above the herd, should one procreate in order to populate the world with superior offspring? If one feels compelled to do so,do so.And make the proper arrangements. But know this first,no one is ever truly "ready" for their first child.You have NO clue. As far as how many I want. The one I have,and the one i'm having. Two reasons: 1.)It will be 2028 when my daughter turns 18 and (hopefully) goes to college.That means I will be 42,and will then be able to take some time for myself and my significant other. a chance to finally walk naked around the house again. . .eating chilli2.)With only two children,I know I can afford their needs,and can give significant direction to them in their lives.This is just the number that is right for me. I don't see how the Amish do it,aside from stating that farms need farmers,and they like 'em "home grown".As far as purposely spawning the "alien elite". . . I'm not going to push my children into anything.I will guide them,and protect them.But they will naturally become whatever it is they will become, of their own volition.
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You stay classy,Satans!
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#411766 - 02/08/10 10:37 PM
Re: How many kids do YOU want?
[Re: Original Sly]
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CoS Member
Registered: 10/18/09
Posts: 350
Loc: Pacific NW
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Zero kids for me and I am a female, too! I've ended relationships over this as there isn't a compromise. I've never felt any "biological imperative" or "urge" to procreate. For me the imperative is to screw, adulterate and create  .
_________________________
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe.
-Albert Einstein
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#411796 - 02/09/10 04:49 AM
Re: How many kids do YOU want?
[Re: Original Sly]
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CoS Member
Registered: 08/21/08
Posts: 227
Loc: England
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I'm probably unusual on here, in that I have two children, both adults, and one of them is a member here (Warlock MJD). For the record, he introduced me to the CoS.
While it's true that children bring about lifestyle changes, it isn't necessarily for the worse - just different. I come from a fairly unemotional family and vowed that when I had children things would be different. My wife and I went through 13 years together (courtship and marriage) before we both wanted kids at the same time and started to plan our family. We were incredibly lucky to have a boy followed by a girl 2 years later.
Both kids had a period as teenagers which was not good, although the love endured, and now I feel as parents my wife and I are reaping the benefits. Both kids live away from home, but relatively local and we see them often. We still get together nearly every weekend and I'm proud of both of them.
Despite the restrictions that small children bring, I wouldn't change any of it, although if the downside of kids had been explained to me I probably wouldn't have had them. That would have been a huge mistake.
Although I feel I'm a relatively good communicator, I cannot explain the feeling of loving small beings, who in turn see you as their world. Neither can I explain how easy it would be to die for the protection of one's own children, without hesitation. I also believe that for some (although I speak only for myself here)the rearing of children brings an emotional roundness unattainable through any other means.
Making a decision not to have children is a very personal one. But it's difficult making a decision whilst only having half the information, and the subjective nature of the missing half only comes with actually having kids. Incredibly difficult, as there's no turning back once the positive decision to have children is made, but it can only really be judged by one's own experience, and then only after the fact.
Then again, perhaps it's true that you don't miss what you never had.
_________________________
Hail Satan! "The pipe draws wisdom from the lips of the philosopher, and shuts up the mouth of the foolish; it generates a style of conversation, contemplative, thoughtful, benevolent, and unaffected..." -William Makepeace Thackeray, from The Social Pipe http://ruraldean.wordpress.com
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#411849 - 02/09/10 10:48 AM
Re: How many kids do YOU want?
[Re: TheAbysmal]
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CoS Member
Registered: 08/16/06
Posts: 1487
Loc: Newfoundland, Canada
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My girlfriend has always wanted kids, but I think her mind is changing since she began working with autistic kids. She sees how difficult it can be raising an autistic child, and how it can impact the relationship of the parents. Now she seems very hesitant on parenthood.
_________________________
"If you're going to be a sinner, be the best sinner on the block." - Anton Szandor LaVey "If everyone is thinking alike, someone isn't thinking." - General George S. Patton JustinR on The Undercroft
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#411865 - 02/09/10 12:19 PM
Re: How many kids do YOU want?
[Re: fire_vixen]
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CoS Witch
Registered: 07/25/01
Posts: 12941
Loc: The Solid State
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Aye, and I don't think a lot of mainstream pro-lifers appreciate that concept. It seems that entirely too many pro-lifers are like the friends of the little red hen---everyone loves babies in theory, but no one wants to have to support those babies, especially if they are born with expensive, debilitating illnesses or disabilities, or are born to illegal aliens, or to single moms in the ghetto.
_________________________
"Gentlemen, the verdict is guilty, on all ten counts of first-degree stupidity. The penalty phase will now begin."--Divine, "Pink Flamingos."
"The strong rule the weak, and the cunning rule over all." HS!
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#411869 - 02/09/10 12:52 PM
Re: How many kids do YOU want?
[Re: ruraldean]
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CoS Reverend
Registered: 07/28/01
Posts: 11174
Loc: New England, USA
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I'm probably unusual on here, in that I have two children, both adults As I'm sure you know, there are a number of other members here with adult offspring. Though most of them stick to the members-only section. While it's true that children bring about lifestyle changes, it isn't necessarily for the worse - just different. In my experience, most of the parents who don't seem to have much of a life outside of parenting, were people who never had much of a social life to begin with. Likewise, many couples I've seen who had their own active hobbies, traveling, and other passions in life have still found a way to pencil time in for those things. I'm quite happy that my own parents did have a life outside of parenting. They spent plenty of time with me and my siblings, but still got to enjoy plenty of time with their hobbies and spending time alone out for the occasional dinner, party, or vacation. Mostly it just meant leaving the party at midnight instead of 4 AM.
_________________________
Reverend Bill M. http://www.devilsmischief.com: Carnal Comedy Clips, Netherworld Novelty Numbers, New hour every week. Download the mp3 now! http://www.aplaceformystuff.org: Tales of Combat Clutter and other Adventures (Wenn du Google's Übersetzer verwendest, um diese Worte zu lesen, dann bist du ein Arschloch.)
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