First, allow me to offer my apologies if the length of my post bores you, but Mark Twain himself once noted that often, we do not have the time to be brief:)
Like many, I have recently been considering membership in the CoS. Having found Satanism at the tender age of sixteen, however, I made the unfortunate decision to associate myself with pseudo-Satanic organizations which, as I soon came to realize, did more to homogenize my life than it did to diversify it.
A few years later, I gave up trying to reconcile the pacifistic, apologetic and mediocre tendencies of these pseudo-Satanic philosophies (which were ultimately based on the writings of Dr. LaVey and the CoS, anyhow) and distanced myself from the online Satanic community (for want of a better word). During this interim, I came to realise that the strong are strongest alone, and strength can only be *nurtured* in the presence of others - *not* created or manifested; that can only happen in the presence of Solitude.
Shortly thereafter (around the age of twenty-one or twenty-two), I applied for membership in the CoS with the knowledge that, at best, it could possibly represent the beginning of a lengthy evolutionary path dependent upon the degree of strength (and solitude) I had previously found for myself.
Having submitted a brief biography with my application, I was subsequently notified by email that due to my prior pseudo-Satanic association, I would be barred from membership within the CoS (though my money order was also returned, for which I am grateful).
Contrary to what the majority may expect, I accepted this eventuation as an opportunity to improve my own station in life, consolidate my Satanic (and NOT pseudo-Satanic) perspective, and critically evaluate my present situation and desired future direction. I soon began to realize my own potential and have, in the last five years (I am now twenty-six) accomplished more than I could ever have imagined (with much more coming in the near future).
This leads me again, some years later, to the prospect of membership within the CoS. Although I could have (presumably) resubmitted my application in the hope that I would be processed without much attention to prior rejection, or even have falsified my details (or changed my legal name), it should be obvious to any self-aware individual that in doing so I would be committing against myself a reprehensible injustice and personal betrayal. That, entirely aside from being a liar and a cheat, which I DO NOT consider myself to be (of course it depends on who you ask:)
Thus, I present this post to you in the hope of further clarification on this matter, and to request advice as to if, and how I should proceed to resubmit an application for membership in the CoS given my prior rejection. Although I can understand the reasoning of CoS administration, I was not aware that pseudo-Satanic organizational involvement precluded CoS affiliation. Moreover, I honestly feel that my initial application was unjustly dismissed and, as I have grown immensely over the past few years, I would like to respectfully request the opportunity to be reconsidered for membership.
Thank you again for taking the time to consider my post.
Kind regards, James.