I agree with Magister Phineas.
I just wanted to add one clarifying comment.
Malform you wrote in part:
...I guess you could say I want to believe, but I just can't help but maintain a skeptical point of view...
Real skepticism is the application of doubt in an effort to determine what may or may not be true.
There are many well-intentioned but misguided people who think that "skepticism" is already being certain about everything, knowing what is absolutely true or false, and then with sword and shield going forth to do battle to correct the entire world and force everyone to agree with "The Truth".
But that is actually religious bigotry, not skepticism at all. You can find this attitude readily in most fundamentalist Christian churches, Muslim mosques, Jewish synagogues, Buddhist temples, and other such places of faith-based religions.
However you can also find the same attitude commonly expressed by those who claim to be skeptics but really are not.
Applying doubt allows you to hopefully gather evidence about things and perhaps get a better handle on what seems to be the facts of the matter at hand.
For example, you have understandably expressed a problem with the issue of real magic in Satanism.
My first answer in this thread was simply telling you how magic is an option for the Satanist and not a requirement.
And this is precisely correct.
However, to claim that you know with absolute certainty that real magic is simply impossible is not
skepticism. It is believing that you already know everything that is possible
The name for that perspective is "omniscience", one of the classic qualities of the Lord God Jehovah, and I suspect that you might not have realized that.
So the Satanist certainly does not claim to know everything. He also is careful to not just swallow what others tell him is supposed to be true. He applies doubt and looks for evidence and tries to draw his own conclusions. He is like Satan, "the Accuser" which is one of the main reasons we call ourselves Satanists.
It is the true believer
who thinks he already knows with certainty everything
that is possible or impossible.
The Satanist will usually decide what he thinks is likely
to be the truth of the matter, but ideally he will remain open to new information, new evidence, and change his views if there is some reason to do so.
Immature minds decide in advance what they think is true and then forever after only defend their assumptions. Hence few people will allow debate to change their opinion on much of anything.
Satanism, being based on doubt, allows the Satanist to also question his own
assumptions over time. This allows us to be flexible in response to new evidence, and to hopefully live in the real world as opposed to the one that others say "should" be.
Immature minds have a drive to be certain about everything.
Mature minds are willing to override that drive for certainty in favor of being willing to learn new things as they pop up.
This is precisely why "Satanism requires study" as Anton LaVey explained.
To be truly skeptical is an ongoing effort to not end up only defending previous assumptions when presented with new information.
To be truly skeptical is to apply doubt and then to hopefully learn more.
As Magister Phineas stated, Satanism really has nothing to do with believing anything.
I hope this helps.