After reading through several introductory e-mails, I've decided to stick to the topic of why and how Satanism appeals to me.
I grew up in a Lutheran family with a fundamentalist mom, who spent a lot of time instituting the fear of hell into me. Despite of this, I came to the scary conclusion in my teens that the classical Christian omniscient, omnipotent and benevolent god is an impossibility.
I was in my early 20's when I picked up the Satanic Bible for the first time. I remember being terrible afraid and excited when I was reading it, even if I've already received the Cliff's notes and knew intellectually that it was just another book, and Satan (as an evil god) cannot be invoked from it, because he doesn't really exist and a book is a book is a book.
During the next ten years I also purchased the Satanic Rituals and Satanic Scriptures and listened to all interviews I could find on Youtube given by members of the Church of Satan
. A few weeks back I finally decided that I might as well pay these guys and applied for a membership/active membership. The only reason I waited this long was because I didn't think it was worth the trouble.
Outside "the internets", I spend most of my time starting and running businesses. Since time management is a constant issue, you will probably see me lurking here on my lunch break more often than finding me posting anything insightful.