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#476254 - 07/08/12 10:43 PM Re: How did you discover Satanism? [Re: Mr_Darkside]
Dax9 Offline

CoS Member

Registered: 10/16/10
Posts: 1023
Loc: near Baton Rouge, LA
Putting it very simply it was when I discovered The Satanic Bible in a B Dalton Bookseller over two decades ago.

After that nature just took its course.

"The difference between the man or woman who's a practicing Satanist, from an identity Satanist is that the practicing Satanist looks at the picture, while the identity Satanist studies the frame."
-- Anton Szandor LaVey

"Anyone without a sense of humor is too pretentious to be a good magician."
-- Anton Szandor LaVey

Life Everlasting

World Without End

#480734 - 09/19/12 06:23 AM Re: How did you discover Satanism? [Re: Mr_Darkside]
Cain Smith Offline

Registered: 09/12/12
Posts: 39
Well, some good day I was searching something on Internet and then I don't remember why but I finished reading the FAQ's of the website of the Church of Satan grin
I don't remember if it was one or two months after that but I remember that I was walking in the street when I saw a kind of bookstore that sold old books grin
I looked through the books and I found a copy of the satanic bible (in Spanish) I bought it and I read it in detail.
Since then I consider myself as satanist grin
It happened when I was 13 coopdevil
He that is slow to believe anything and everything is of great understanding, for belief in one false principle is the beginning of all unwisdom.
-The Book Of Satan 2:7-

#480756 - 09/19/12 02:31 PM Re: How did you discover Satanism? [Re: Mr_Darkside]
Alonocus Blight Offline


Registered: 10/31/11
Posts: 241
Loc: NC
I had always been attracted to the “dark side,” but I never knew that there was a particular term that applied to me.
When I was in my teens in high school, I wore black a lot and was in a gang called the Hell Patrol. It was our “anti-hero” version of the “preps’” gang which was known as the Pearl Street Posse (P.S.P.). We never did anything illegal aside from fighting jocks at football games, etcetera. Most of my friends didn’t participate in athletics during high school, but I was involved in track and field and wrestling. It’s interesting to note that like Mason Rust, I too was involved in individual sports. The sport that I excelled in the most was power lifting and I took a gold medal in 1994 at the state highs school power lifting meet. I was very proud of myself, as I had not excelled in other sports.
After high school, I became interested in Wicca and studied under a mentor for a short time. I met my first wife at a metaphysical shop in our hometown. At that time in my life, I was searching for the darker side of me and of life. I would listen to and ponder the lyrics of King Diamond and Mercyful Fate. I later married the girl from the metaphysical shop.
Somehow we became involved in Christianity for many years. As time passed in our marriage, I became a guilt-laden slave to Christianity with all the “bells and whistles.” There was a time when I drove the church bus to pick up the kids for Sunday school. On one particular occasion, the church’s pastor had to ride with me to the gas station to refuel the bus. When we arrived at the gas station there was a feeling in me that was hard to shake. I looked over at the feeble man that preached the philosophy of a risen zombie that pushed slavery and passivity over aggression and deliberation. I kept thinking to myself, “I would like to punch this man right in the nose and shatter his spectacles and watch him bleed!” “Then I will strangle him with my bare hands.” But, I fought off the sinister urge. At the time I didn’t fully understand my feelings. Later on I realized that my contempt for the preacher revolved around the notion that I was merely working for a “good guy badge” which the church’s committee dangled over my gullible head.
I was in the Army then as well. Later my wife and I moved with the Army to Colorado. We found a different but similar church to attend there. I quickly became involved in the church’s choir and was satisfied with my life for a time. But, strange things kept happening to me of which I had a hard time dealing with. One noteworthy detail was when I began remembering all of the dark and wonderful music that I used to listen to as a teen. I would be driving the 45 miles to work and absolutely have to listen to some black metal. When the local radio station wouldn’t play my odd requests, I began to download the lyrics to my favorite songs so that I could perform them a cappella. Later on, I started telling my former wife that I was working late just to get out of church. I would pull up to our house which was 45 miles from Fort Carson after my wife and kids had already left for church and the house would be empty for hours. I would quickly get busy performing a cappella versions of my favorite King Diamond, Mercyful Fate and Judas Priest songs. I was still involved with the church choir and I was asked to perform a trio, music special for the Sunday service. I did my best to incorporate some falsetto and timing changes into my parts to make the song sound heavier. The song was performed on Sunday morning, and recorded as well. But the song did not become publically available because of the way that I sang my parts.
I later deployed to Afghanistan in support of Operation Enduring Freedom 10. While deployed, I became increasingly fascinated with the carnality of life and the selfish pleasures of which I had denied myself for so very long. In my spare time I read many, various horror stories including Alfred Hitchcock, Stephen King, and Clive Barker. Additionally, I would spend my spare time reading the works of Aleister Crowley and the works of the Order of Nine Angles. All the while I was fascinated by the philosophy and music of King Diamond and Mercyful Fate and I practiced my growling and scream singing every chance that I got. I also began an affair with the beautiful woman of my life who is now my wife. My antics at work while deployed attracted the attention of one particular individual who identified himself as a former Satanist. He challenged me to read the Satanic Bible. When I couldn’t find a copy of TSB, I ordered TSB and TSS from Amazon. When the books came in I tore through them and saw myself in the captivating, bold words of Anton LaVey. I began performing the rituals as outlined in the TSB with the minimal accoutrements necessary for productive rituals and I truly saw greater magic working for me. During the deployment I realized that I could not just let the love of my life simply slip through my fingers as the sands near the sea. And so, I made a deliberate commitment to live a life of happiness and prosperity instead of a life of entrapments and religious slavery.
My girlfriend and I were later caught together and we were both dealt with, compliments of the uniform code of military justice. However, after I proposed to her, we made secret arrangements to divorce our former spouses so that we could legally marry each other after the deployment.
After the deployment and a re-read of TSB and TSS, I married my new wife, who accepts and loves me just the way that I am and I mailed off my request to become an active member with the Church of Satan.
One thing that kept me going through the turmoil that arose during the deployment was a quote from TSB which says, “Blessed are those that believe in what is best for them, for never shall their minds be terrorized.”
"Satanic Story Time is a podcast which takes the listener on a journey through fiction's satanic history."

"Life is the great indulgence--death, the great abstinence. Therefore, make the most of life--HERE AND NOW!"

#480759 - 09/19/12 03:47 PM Re: How did you discover Satanism? [Re: Mr_Darkside]
Robert K Stock Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 08/22/12
Posts: 62
Loc: El Reno, Oklahoma
I saw an ad for the Satanic Bible on and wanted to see what the Church of Satan had to say about the occult. When I recieved my copy of the Satanic Bible I did not find anything about the occult. However, by happy accident I found the same rational egoist philosophy that I had been trying to apply in my life for the past twenty years.

#480884 - 09/21/12 10:37 PM Re: How did you discover Satanism? [Re: Robert K Stock]
mercfocus Offline

Registered: 09/01/12
Posts: 20
Loc: San Diego CA
How did I discover Satanism? Facebook

Someone shared "this is awkward"s photo.

It had a top and bottom part:
On the top part, it showed VP candidate Ryan quoted as saying something like- All my philosophies on capitolism and self improvement come from Ayn Rand's philosophies (paraphrased). Note identifies him as the VP candidate.
On the bottom part: It showed Anton Lavey and him saying something like- My philosohpy is alot of Ayn Rand's with rituals and religion (paraphrased). Then it identifies him as the founder of the Church of Satan.

This was about over a month ago. I'd never seen or heard of Anton Lavey or the Church of Satan before that but since I have a very personal and sincere resentment against xtians, I immediately started Google searching things. Found out who lavey was and all about the Satanic Bible and that it is readily available at Barnes and Noble and Amazon! Holy shit!

I read the SB in just a few short days. I didn't read books that well or that fast when I was in college.

The rest is recent history.

#480950 - 09/23/12 04:55 AM Re: How did you discover Satanism? [Re: Mr_Darkside]
Juliana Offline

Registered: 09/23/12
Posts: 1
Loc: England
I discovered Satanism from a special edition of the Classic
Rock Magazine, dealing with the link that Hard Rock and Metal have to Satanism.
Obviously, very curious about it, I looked up Church of Satan on Wikipedia, read it and then clicked the link for the CoS website.
I bought a copy of the Satanic Bible from Amazon, quickly followed by all the other books the Church requires you read.

I have always been an atheist, very unconventional and drawn to the dark side, not truly knowing what I was but, of course, I do now. Satanism has helped me peel away the remaining layers of convention and mediocrity to be the person I really want to be.

Hail Satan.

Edited by Juliana (09/23/12 05:04 AM)

#481313 - 10/02/12 09:32 AM Re: How did you discover Satanism? [Re: Mr_Darkside]
ConquerOrPerish Offline

Registered: 11/29/07
Posts: 258
Loc: DC Metro Area
I was raised Anglican because of Pascal's Wager but I started thinking about it and it didn't make logical sense. I started reading the Bible and it made even less sense. I lost my faith and found I didn't need it. The only good it did was circular: to escape it's own final end, that is hell.

A few years ago after I graduated from Ivy, I started reflecting on the injustices of the world. I was particularly upset about how multiculturalism excuses sexist practices in other cultures, saying, you know, "oh well that's their culture."

I mentioned it to a pen pal, an Australian Calvinist. He said that's because in this world might is still right. Women are weak and at the mercy of whatever men they find themselves around, all over the world, but much less so in the West due to freedom and chivalry. I was intrigued by the phrase might is right and randomly put the phrase into Amazon. I found my favorite read Might is Right Survival of the Fittest. You know how when you order a book Amazon suggests other books? Well they were all Satanic books. So I absorbed them and knew I had found my home.

That's the short of it.
High hopes faint on a warm hearth stone, she travels the fastest who travels alone.

#481626 - 10/12/12 10:32 PM Re: How did you discover Satanism? [Re: Mr_Darkside]
Zeviander Offline

Registered: 10/12/12
Posts: 33
Loc: MB, Canada
Nothing in particular really. Both my forays into the world of Mr. LaVey's work were happened upon by mere coincidence.

The first, in high school, largely because I was rebellious (for a high-achiever, this meant less physical, and more mental types of action; such as purposefully avoiding the capitalization of the Abrahamic "God" in a class whose teacher was devoutly religious), so while it appealed to this attitude I had at the time, it had no resonance within my actual person.

The second time was earlier this year (approximately a decade later). As I had mentioned in my intro thread, I had a non-religious religious experience that altered how I perceived reality (as a connected whole of matter and energy, with no discernable purpose or direction) that involved Alan Moore's "Watchmen" and a concentrated frustration with my efforts in trying to find a religion (hint: I found nothing but myself in the universe and truly "lived in the moment" for several hours).

A couple months later, I was working full time nights and needed things to kill time (and keep me awake amid severe illness; staying up that late destroyed my immune system). Out of the blue, I decide to read The Satanic Bible (admittedly, a digital copy ill-gotten of the internet; but this is why I was working nights, I could barely pay the bills) and pretty much finished it in a single sitting.

This is when the resonance really came forwards. Even the parts regarding ritual and magic (something I could never understand it's place in other religion... I was looking at it as an intellectual, not trying to "experience it") which actually made sense, and gave me insight as to how I can read people through body language much easier than their words.

For several months after (until present) I have been largely uninterested in any sort of intellectual pursuit, but have begun striving to do more with my life ("career apathy" kicked in) and have begun reading again. I started with several religious texts I enjoyed a while back, but found them boring and useless. Picked up the SB again and was drawn right back into a world of insight and interesting ideas.

Ever since playing Doom II: Hell On Earth at the age of 8, I have found great resonance with all manner of satanic imagery, whether associated with the CoS or otherwise. The inverted pentagram, occurrences of patterns of "6's" and macabre themes have always drawn my interest.

All in all, I'd say I am incredibly inexperienced with Satanism from an academic perspective... and absolutely inexperienced with it in an applied sense with my life. A lot of the basic framework strikes home true, but I have a lot of personal and psychological hangups that prevent me from really grabbing life by the balls and indulging without compulsion (excessive eating is a big problem for me). That, and I have a complex that makes me paranoid about what others are thinking about me leftover from childhood bullying, causing self-image issues, yada yada yada.

My hope is that the honourable LaVey's work, and that of his respected allies, will help me overcome my hangups, so I can start enjoying life completely free.

#481647 - 10/13/12 01:56 PM Re: How did you discover Satanism? [Re: Mr_Darkside]
Lilibeta Offline

Registered: 12/06/08
Posts: 157
Loc: Alberta, Canada
My parents were rabid Catholics who tried to force their beliefs on me. At one point I took the attitude that my allegiance was for sale. Which ever deity stepped up and gave me what I wanted, had my devotion. None stepped up. In the end, I made my dreams come true. I was the god that answered my prayers. Pretty simple but I did my best to complicate the matter.

Mistaking my love of nature for paganism, I joined a Wiccan group and was promptly ear-marked for the priesthood. I enjoyed the knowledge and the community but a lot of them just made my skin crawl, bunch of tree-hugging hippies with their 'perfect love and perfect trust'. I didn't love or trust any of of them but I enjoyed belonging and the sharing of knowledge so I stayed.

Part of the priesthood training was to learn about other religions. I picked up the Satanic Bible, something no one else did. Fascinating, honest read. It was like someone holding up a mirror to me. However my teachers were less than enthusiastic.

He's a charlatan. Nothing he writes is true. He's hiding the truth. You have to watch out for him. He used to work in a carnival, what does that tell you? I've met him, he's very charismatic. Don't read that again.
That's what I was told. Ok, maybe they're wrong and maybe they're right. Let's wait and see.

I missed a class, I missed a circle. Why weren't you at class? Why weren't you at circle? You know, if you want to be a priestess.... To learn you must suffer.... A lot of things came together at once and I realized that I wasn't being honest with myself and I was cheating the others. I walked, from the church and from Wicca.

One wintery morning while I was packing away my Wicca books I found TSB. I opened it and began to read. The next thing I knew I was reaching to turn on a light because it was night.

I've said before that for me, faith has always been work; a constant fight against my own nature to attempt to be what others have said that I should want to be. I decided at that moment as I turned on the light, that I was done fighting.

For my sins I will ask no forgiveness. For my sins they are not to forgive.

#481700 - 10/14/12 02:46 PM Re: How did you discover Satanism? [Re: Zeviander]
DamnedLucky Offline

CoS Member

Registered: 08/03/06
Posts: 373
Loc: Massachusetts, USA
First off, welcome to the boards. I was going to say that in your intro post but wanted to respond to this.

Originally Posted By: Zeviander
Out of the blue, I decide to read The Satanic Bible (admittedly, a digital copy ill-gotten of the internet; but this is why I was working nights, I could barely pay the bills) and pretty much finished it in a single sitting.

If that ill-gotten copy is still the only one in your possession then you are ripping off whomever owns the copyright (Blanche Barton?) It is not an expensive book, and from what you've written it sounds like it's had enough of an impact on your life to justify the purchase, even if a year from now you decide this just isn't for you.

Perhaps you've already made the purchase. If so, and if it's the only one of the canon you own, I'd recommend The Church of Satan next. It's an excellent introductory book.

#481712 - 10/14/12 06:10 PM Re: How did you discover Satanism? [Re: Mr_Darkside]
CWH Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 04/22/05
Posts: 3746
When I was in high school I had a girlfriend whose brother had a copy of the Satanic Bible. I picked it up, but was too chicken-shit to even open it up; like I was going to get struck by lightning or something. That was in 1996 or '97, I believe.

In 2004 I was deployed in Iraq. I ran into another Marine that was carrying it and I asked him if I could borrow it.

I read it and of course I'm sure you can guess what happened next. I actually cursed myself for not reading it the first time I encountered it. In 2005, on my 25th birthday, I became a registered member of the CoS.

#481720 - 10/14/12 10:29 PM Re: How did you discover Satanism? [Re: CWH]
Janina Offline
CoS Member

Registered: 12/06/11
Posts: 1611
Loc: Center of my own Universe
Originally Posted By: CWH
I'm sure you can guess what happened next. I actually cursed myself for not reading it the first time I encountered it.

Obviously your "process" started already when you first saw the book though you did not read it and recognize your Satanism in first place.

I see that we are naturally born this way, but we all have to do some job to find it out who we are and where should we stand. Some people find it easy way, some harder. Still cause Satanism supports us to be the way we naturally are it does not change so much in one´s nature. For that reason cursing yourself for letting the book off your hands without reading it is counter productive way to see this issue. You have read the book later and are member as a result of that. Everything else is just steps leading to the point you are standing today!
Devil´s Advocate

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