Greetings to all!I am new here as you'll see so i feel i should give a short introduction.So, i have recently discovered satanism, i agree on its philosophy on every level and i loud like to see if i'm really fit for it and where it drives me.
All my life to this day i fight my weaknesses and those things that i think eventually will end up as a negative influence over me.I believe in self discipline and always questioning what comes at me, in fact i scan my self thought so much to come up with different possibilities which may contain the answer that i'm looking for to resolve my problem, that i get way too far and most of the times live in illusions which i take as the answer cause they seem likeable i guess.One of my main goals is to preserve my individuality and piece of mind, under any circumstance,influence and situation.I guess that mostly this is driven by fear of accepting the consequences of being a weak individual.In everything i see a test of personality.Anyway,i have always been passive in physical confrontation and most of the time i am put in a position that i have to defend my self in a physical fight because not of many people around me can state them selfs with words.So if i don't fight back i'm putting my self at their mercy and i'm finding my self in fear of the consequences or in fear of physical confrontation so i have trouble fighting back or delivering the violence first even though i want to do these things.
So i that makes me a coward.
But i don't wont to be in this position and i want to resolve my problem and overpower my fear.I don't think that nature has cowardice locked on us, and in this case i can fight it.
Or am i in another illusion and trying to progress over my natures cage.
My question is.
Do you think that an individual can rise up to the philosophy and apply it in life if he doesn't hold all the right qualities for now to live it?